Quantum Alchemy Lab

Quantum Alchemy Lab For people who understand their patterns completely but can't change them. Emotional intelligence consulting for individuals, families, and organisations.

Founded by Liliana Pooja Baxi, former international M&A lawyer.

28/08/2026

Two households raising the same children can either drain those children's nervous systems or steady them. Whether the parents like each other has surprisingly little to do with which one happens.

My own children have moved between two households more times than I could count by now. There's real history behind that arrangement, the kind most separated families carry. And still, the logistics mostly stay logistics. Handoffs happen. Plans change. Nobody has to relitigate the marriage to coordinate a Tuesday.

That took work to build, and it isn't the work people assume it is. It's not having to like your co-parent. It's not having to agree on everything, or even most things. It's being regulated enough, individually, that a shared practical problem gets to stay a practical problem instead of becoming a re-run of everything that was never resolved between the adults.

Children register that difference immediately, long before they could explain it. They don't need their parents to be friends. They need the handoff between two homes to feel calm rather than charged.

Most co-parenting advice focuses on communication scripts and custody logistics. Almost none of it addresses the actual mechanism, which is nervous system regulation in each parent individually, not negotiation skill between the two of them. Fix the first thing and the second one tends to follow.

I spent years being excellent at managing things. Managing my schedule, managing conflict, managing exactly how much of ...
26/08/2026

I spent years being excellent at managing things. Managing my schedule, managing conflict, managing exactly how much of myself to show in a room full of people deciding whether I was worth the risk. I had techniques for all of it. Breathing. Boundaries. The ability to name precisely what was happening in my body the moment an old feeling surfaced.

I used to think that was the work. Getting good enough at managing something that it stopped being a problem.

It took me a long time to understand that coping and changing are not the same thing, and that you can spend a decade doing the first while believing you're doing the second.

Coping is what keeps a pattern survivable while it's still running underneath everything. Changing is what happens when the pattern actually stops running. From the outside, these can look identical. Same composure. Same fluency in talking about your own psychology. Entirely different thing happening structurally.

The tell is never in the moments you're prepared for. It's in the ones you're not. Tired. Blindsided. An ordinary day with nothing at stake and no reason to be performing wellness for anyone.

That's not a failure. It's just where the real information has been the whole time.

I built Quantum Alchemy Lab around that distinction, because I spent too many years mistaking one for the other to let anyone else waste the same amount of time.

The time I conquered my deepest rational fear. The fear of getting hurt. Growing up in super car-crowded Bombay, I learn...
23/08/2026

The time I conquered my deepest rational fear. The fear of getting hurt.

Growing up in super car-crowded Bombay, I learnt early on that cycling on the streets was dangerous. And - what you do mean YOU have to keep the balance to not fall off?? What if fall on the concrete or crash into an incoming car??

I hadn’t cycled since 2011.. until last night. When a friend said “ahhh - why not?” and I just couldn’t live with my answer “because I’m scared”. So I got on.

Yes, I fell twice. And yes, I got up thrice. Just like in life. And guess what? It really wasn’t that hard.. nothing at all compared to the knowing that my oldest fear doesn’t run my life anymore 🙌🏽😁

13/08/2026

The seduction of workaholism, and self-sabotage, is real.

Workaholism is the Pied Piper of our times. The worst kind of co-dependency. It’s rewarded & celebrated for taking you away from everyone you love..

The weekends spent on calls, the late nights of useless deliverables, the friends you skipped to review that term sheet, the celebration you missed to send that email. It never ends!

My kids called me “the mum that’s not there”. It stung because it was true.

I’m not falling into that BS again. This time around, I’m holding my boundaries with my worst boss - me.

I like working hard & succeeding. I just don’t like being a martyr to it, or making it my entire personality.

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