The Black Box Approach

The Black Box Approach We help people unbox human connections at work. We help people talk about the ups and downs of life

29/07/2026

Sometimes the weight someone is carrying gets too much.

Sometimes they decide the only way to put it down is to stop.

The research is clear. Asking someone if they're thinking about ending their life doesn't make it more likely. It makes it less.

People in that much pain don't want to die. They want the pain to stop.

We can help with that. We just have to be willing to ask.

22/07/2026

You started typing the message. You deleted it.

You started again. You deleted it again.

It's not my place. I don't know what to say. I'll probably make it worse.

Whose barriers are those, really?

Not theirs. Yours. And the message stays in the drafts. And nothing changes.

15/07/2026

The most expensive person on your payroll isn't the one who's off sick.

It's the one who's at their desk but not really there.

I know this because I was that person the day I parked an aircraft on the wrong stand at Heathrow.

Bum on a seat. Mind somewhere else. Decisions still getting made.

Presenteeism costs two and a half times more than absenteeism. And nobody is measuring it.

08/07/2026

The reason you don't say anything isn't that you don't care.

It's that you don't have the words.

Try one of these.

"You've been on my mind. I just wanted to check in."

"I know we don't talk much, but I've had a feeling something might be up. If I'm wrong, ignore me."

"No pressure to reply. Just wanted you to know I'm thinking of you."

You don't need perfect words. You just need to show up.

01/07/2026

March 4th, 2020. Manchester Airport.

Someone taped an A4 sheet to the aircraft door. The company had collapsed in a matter of hours.

I'd flown for twenty years. I'd known how to handle the small stuff and the big stuff.

I had nothing in the toolbox for this.

What followed was months of bathrooms and beards and booze. Until one person got out of their own way and asked the question.

That's the whole reason this work exists.

24/06/2026

Nobody leaves their life at the door at 9am.

We never have. We never will.

Death, debt, divorce, depression. Whatever someone is carrying, they bring it in with them.

The only question is whether your culture lets them put it down for a moment, or makes them carry it harder.

17/06/2026

There are three financial costs of someone not being well at work.

Most leaders only count one.

Absenteeism is the visible one. Staff turnover is the painful one.

Presenteeism is the most expensive — and the one nobody tracks.

It costs more than the other two combined. And it's happening on your team right now.

15/06/2026

Your loved ones aren't mind readers. Your team can't guess at your needs. The people in your life deserve to know exactly what you think, exactly what you feel, and exactly what matters to you.

It's not unprofessional to be direct. It's not awkward to be clear. It's honest. It's respectful.

It's the kind of communication that actually changes things.

So here's the question: What have you been inferring when you could be saying?

12/06/2026

Tissues should be used for bogies, not for tears.

Today marks a year since 260 people lost their lives when an aircraft crashed in Ahmedabad. It's a day of reflection on how these things happen and the ripple effect of the aftermath.

Anniversaries are weird things. Some of us choose to commemorate them with celebration of the time we had with the people that have died and others choose a quiet contemplation. Both are valid. Both matter. And both can leave us feeling a bit untethered if we're not sure what to do with the day itself.

I've learned that the people around the grieving person often feel this too.

There's an awkwardness. A "should I mention it?" question that hangs in the air.

So let me give you some things you can do when an anniversary of a death comes around for someone you know:

Notice it. Mark the date. Text them. Send a card. Do something that says "I remembered too." The fear that mentioning it will make them sad is usually misplaced - they're probably already feeling sad. What they might not be is remembered.

Name them. Use the person's name. Say what you know about them. "I was thinking about X today" or "I remember you telling me about X." It's remarkable how much relief comes from someone else saying their name out loud.

Nudge gently. Ask what they need. Do they want to talk about the person? Do they want a distraction? Do they want company or space? Don't assume. And don't disappear from their orbit just because it's hard.

Grief doesn't expire. But neither does the chance to be human about it.

10/06/2026

Youngest of four boys. Boarding school. Then the cockpit.

Every part of my life taught me the same thing: don't talk about it.

I was good at the mask. Most leaders are. It's how we got the job.

The problem is the mask works until it doesn't.

And then someone has to be brave enough to ask what's underneath.

Address

London
EC1R0NE

Telephone

+443301333733

Website

Alerts

Be the first to know and let us send you an email when The Black Box Approach posts news and promotions. Your email address will not be used for any other purpose, and you can unsubscribe at any time.

Contact The Business

Send a message to The Black Box Approach:

Shortcuts

Share

Category