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Blissful Tots

Gentle, holistic and evidence-based approach to help your tot and family sleeping blissfully.

16/08/2022

YES, I am still breastfeeding my 3-year-old. 🤱🏽

👉 NO, I don't think she's too old.

👉 NO, we don't know when we are going to stop.

👉 NO, she won't eat more food if I stop.

I feel like I have to constantly justify why I'm still breastfeeding my little girl. I've lost count of the number of times I've received unsolicited advice or just sarcastic comments. It often feels like I need to defend my choice. Instead, it would be so great for more people to show me some encouragement because it hasn’t always been easy.

In the UK we have some of the lowest breastfeeding rates in the world, with eight out of ten women stopping breastfeeding before they want to. Perhaps if we changed the way to spoke to mums, it might help change things.

I'm fortunate to have a partner who has supported me every single day, if I didn't have that, I probably would have weaned a long time ago.

Mamas who have breastfed a toddler or beyond, what's your experience been?

07/06/2022

Mamas, no one could love your child like you do, you are the perfect mum for your little one.

Love Divya x

💞

02/06/2022

Responsiveness is such an incredibly powerful parenting tool which is linked to many important benefits for children. So what is it? It refers to parenting that is prompt, dependent on the child’s behaviour and appropriate to a child’s needs and developmental states.

It can be broken down into 3 main steps:

1) Observation: The parent/caregiver observes and notices their child’s unique cues and signals which communicate an underlying need. These cues could include body language, movements, behaviour or sounds/vocalisations – for example, crying, yawning or rooting.

2) Interpretation: The parent accurately interprets these cues and signals. For example, the caregiver accurately interprets that their infant who is rooting and sucking their fists is hungry and needs to be fed.

3) Action: The parent acts promptly, consistently and efficiently, with love, kindness and empathy to meet the child’s needs.

Studies show parental responsiveness in early childhood is linked with a number of positive outcomes, like:
• Social competence
• Fewer behavioural and emotional problems
• Increased IQ and cognitive development
• Language development
• School achievement
• Higher self-esteem

Responsive parenting can also help to lay the foundations to build a secure attachment between you and your baby. So you can see, it is an immensely important parenting tool!

01/06/2022

Your baby is perfect, don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. Mamas and papas, you are not doing anything wrong if your baby doesn’t behave the way the parenting books or other people tell you babies should act. Every single child is different, just like every single adult! 👶🏽

books

21/04/2022

Eek, sometimes I really cringe when I remember some of the things I would say before I became a mum for the first time! Honestly, until you have your own child, who YOU are responsible for ALL THE TIME, you have no idea how tough it is!

Do you remember any of the things you would say before you became a parent? I remember saying I would always give my child a proper response, regardless of how many times they asked me the question ‘WHY’?..

Seriously, what was I thinking!

11/04/2022

There is a myth that if breastfeeding is natural it should come naturally to both baby and mother. In fact, breastfeeding can be really hard. With my first daughter, it was a roller coaster of emotions and setbacks. I didn’t turn to the right people for help, I got bad advice and I ended up stopping long before I really wanted to. I still feel guilty about the entire experience.

Some mothers and babies get the hang of breastfeeding straightaway. For many though it often takes time to figure out how it works, and there may be other challenges to overcome, like anatomical issues such as tongue tie.

If breastfeeding is something you want to do, then you don't have to struggle alone. There is support although it may feel like it's difficult to find.

Here's a good start - The National Breastfeeding Helpline - 0300 100 0212.

What's was your feeding journey like?

06/04/2022

A first time mama asked me if she should respond to her baby during the night if she cries because of teething pain.

I asked her a question in return: if your baby was distressed during the day, would you comfort her or leave her alone?

The mama replied immediately: ‘of course’.

If you wouldn’t feel comfortable doing something in the day, then it’s probably not appropriate to do it at night either. Your baby doesn’t know what time of the day it is, they simply know that they have a need which can only be met by you. There is a lot of emphasis in the baby sleep industry to make our little ones as independent as possible, as quickly as possible, but our babies haven’t read those parenting books, they are simply developing at their own pace. So if you are ever in doubt, it is absolutely okay to respond to your baby’s needs both during the day and night.

Divya
x

24/01/2022

Parents often ask me: 'How much sleep does my baby need?' The reality is, there isn't a definite number I can give to this question. There is a huge range of what is considered an ‘appropriate’ amount of sleep for little ones, at different ages. For example, the National Sleep Foundation (NSF) recommends that a newborn should sleep between 14 to 17 hours over a day. However, based on their comprehensive analysis of existing data, the says it might also be appropriate for some newborns to have as little as 11 hours of daily sleep, while for some newborns, it may be as high as 19 hours.

What this shows is that every baby has different sleep needs and some may need more or less than the recommended amount. I wouldn’t get consumed if your little one doesn’t not fit the recommendations; some babies have very low sleep needs while others have much higher.

Instead, to help you figure out if your tot is getting enough sleep, you should look at the ‘full picture’ so, ask yourself:

👉🏼 Is your tot generally happy when they are awake?
👉🏼 Does your tot feed well and weight gain is on the right track?
👉🏼 Is your tot meeting developmental milestones?

If you can say ‘yes’ to all of these questions, then you can be fairly confident that your tot is getting the right amount of sleep they need.

Love Divya x

20/01/2022

Mama, you are enough! You are amazing. You don't need to be perfect.

Beautiful words by

-love

compassion

-care

18/01/2022

We've had quite a few rough nights the last week, and these 5 tips have got us through the long days!

16/01/2022

Mamas, no one could love your child like you do, you are the perfect mum for your little one.

Divya x

06/01/2022

This is kind advice, but it’s really not practical for many parents. I find it really difficult to sleep when my girls nap, but I always try to sit down and have a much deserved break. It is my time to do something for myself. The cleaning, the cooking, the laundry, the fixing, the sorting, will never end and it can all wait till later.

We all deserve a few minutes to look after our own needs. Be kind to yourself mamas. 💁‍♀️

What do you do when your little one naps? 💤

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