Maris Severance

10/18/2026

One of the biggest changes in me over the years is the question I ask when I don't feel appreciated.

There are people in my life I've done a lot for.

Friends. Colleagues. People I've supported, helped, encouraged, connected, worked for or shown up for in ways they probably don't completely see.

Years ago, that could really bother me.

I'd want them to understand how much I was doing. I'd want the acknowledgment. And if I didn't get it, I could spend a lot of energy thinking about it.

Now I find myself asking a very different question:

Do I actually still enjoy doing this?

That's much more useful to me than trying to get someone else to recognize everything I've contributed.

Because if the answer is yes, I can keep doing it because I genuinely want to.

And if the answer is no, then there's something for me to pay attention to.

That shift has given me a lot of energy back.

I'm less interested in keeping a mental record of everything I've done and much more interested in whether the way I'm living and working still feels true for me.

That, to me, is part of becoming unbound.

You stop needing everybody else to confirm that what you gave mattered before you're allowed to decide what you want to give next.

10/17/2026

10/15/2026

What’s something you’ve said no to recently, even though part of you really wanted to say yes?

10/14/2026

I was supposed to be in Kentucky last week.

Our daughter turned 21, and of course I wanted to be there.

Normally, that alone would probably have been enough for me to go.

I would have looked at who needed me, what was happening, what I might miss, who might be disappointed, and somehow found the energy to make it work.

This time I didn't.

It's been a very full few months. I traveled to Europe this summer, we've had an incredibly hot summer here in New Mexico, there has been a lot going on in my personal life, and when I really checked in with myself, I knew I needed to stay home.

That didn't make the decision easy.

Even three days after I'd decided not to go, I was still going back and forth.

Maybe I should go.

Maybe I'll regret it.

It's her 21st birthday.

Eventually, I stopped revisiting the decision and stayed with what I already knew.

And I'm so glad I did.

I hadn't realized how much I needed this space until I actually gave it to myself.

Everything in me feels like one long, deep exhale.

I've been sleeping, taking care of things around my home, spending time in my body, and feeling more grounded and connected to myself than I have in quite a while.

And I'm still part of my daughter's birthday. I've been arranging a little surprise for her from here, and I get to love her without overriding myself to prove that love.

I think that's one of the things that has changed most for me.

I used to make a lot of decisions based on whether I could do something.

Now I'm much more interested in whether it's actually right for me to do it.

Those are two very different questions.

But I did organize a surprise party from here. :-)

10/12/2026

I work with a lot of women who are very good at what they do.

And yet they're exhausted.

They're answering the email when they really want to be done for the day.

They're picking up the phone because they're afraid the client might go somewhere else.

They're giving more than they agreed to, making exceptions, staying available and constantly thinking about what everyone else needs.

I've seen this with realtors, coaches, therapists and women running their own businesses.

And usually they already know they need better boundaries.

Knowing that isn't necessarily the hard part.

The hard part is what comes up when they actually set one.

What if the client gets upset?

What if they choose someone else?

What if I miss an opportunity?

What if I'm asking for too much?

That's where the Invisible Load goes much deeper than having too much to do.

When you're carrying responsibility for everyone else's experience of you, it becomes very difficult to make clean decisions based on what is actually right for you.

And that's a big part of the work I do with women.

We work with what has you overgiving, over-functioning and negotiating your own needs, so you can own your value, say what you want, make a stand for it and stop organizing your life around the fear of somebody else's reaction.

Because sometimes the very thing you're afraid will cost you clients, love or opportunities is what allows people to meet you differently.

If you've been recognizing yourself in this series and you're ready to change some of these patterns, let's talk.

You can book a complimentary 30-minute Hello Sesh with me here:

👉 https://calendly.com/marisseverance/hello-sesh

We'll look at what's happening for you, what you want to change, and whether working together feels like the right next step.

10/11/2026

Where are you still waiting for someone else to say, “Yes, you can”?

10/10/2026

I was a pretty bold kid.

I knew what I wanted, I loved to win, and I was usually the one getting something started.

I'd gather the other kids, come up with an idea and get everyone moving. I was creative, playful, outspoken and pretty good at making things happen.

And the other kids actually benefited from that. I brought energy into the group.

But I also learned that being that girl wasn't always welcome.

I was often the one who got things first or succeeded easily, and my mother would sometimes hold me back to give my siblings more of a chance.

I understand why she did that.

But what landed in me was that there was something about the way I naturally moved through the world that needed to be toned down a little.

Don't be quite so bold.

Don't always be the one who goes first.

Make room.

And over the years, I did.

I became much better at waiting, considering everyone else, stepping aside and making sure I wasn't taking too much.

The interesting thing is that some of the qualities I eventually had to work to reclaim were qualities that had once been completely natural to me.

My courage. My initiative. My creativity. My ability to see an opportunity and go for it.

That girl is still very much in me.

She's playful and bold. She creates things quickly. She likes adventure. She sings. She speaks her mind. She likes being seen. And when she sees an opportunity that feels right, she moves.

I've spent a lot of years becoming more of her again.

Maybe growing into ourselves isn't always about becoming someone new.

Sometimes there are parts of us that have been waiting a very long time for us to stop holding them back.

P.S.: Guess who I am in the picture... ;-)

10/09/2026

What’s something you want that you’ve been hesitating to claim?

10/07/2026

What would you go for if you stopped worrying about being “too much”?