02/26/2025
DEI INCLUDES EVERYONE ... WHITE MEN, TOO
Several years ago, I was teaching DEI workshops for the Veterans Administration hospitals throughout the State of Ohio. One morning in Chillicothe, a middle-aged white male in a military baseball cap came into the workshop room, sat in the back row, crossed his arms, and settled in for the three-hour session. He didn’t say a word, but he didn’t have to – his body language spoke volumes. He was not happy to be there.
About half-way through the workshop, I noticed that he had uncrossed his arms and had helped himself to a cup of coffee. And the next thing I knew, he was actually taking notes!
After the workshop was over, he approached me to talk. As he held out his hand for me to shake it, he said, “My name is Bob and I want you to know that I’m a very conservative guy.”
“I got that,” I replied, shaking his hand.
“The last I ever wanted to do was attend a DEI workshop,” he continued. “I tried everything to get out of it, but my boss made me come.”
“I understand,” I nodded. “That’s a very common sentiment, especially among white males. They often think that ‘diversity’ doesn’t apply to them – they think it’s all about women and people of color.”
“Right,” he nodded. “But worse than that, we feel like we’re always portrayed as the bad guys. Us white guys get blamed for discrimination, for harassment, for all the problems in the workplace, it seems.”
“I hear ya,” I said.
“Well, I just wanted you to know that by the time you were halfway through your workshop, you had me taking notes. This whole peacock and penguin thing ... I get it. Your birds helped me see that diversity isn’t just about race and gender – it’s about all kinds of differences – personality, work style, values, education, profession, and more. Even us white guys aren’t all alike, that’s for sure! Yeah, some of us are penguins – but some of us are peacocks, hawks, owl, doves, gooney birds, seagulls, or some other kind of bird. So I wanted to thank you. Now I understand the whole diversity thing and I realize that it DOES include me.”
I thanked Bob for taking the time to share his thoughts and feelings with me. He didn’t have to do that – he could have just left the workshop and gone about his day. But the fact that he took the time made me see that this had been a powerful experience for him. He had encountered an idea – a simple bird metaphor – that made him question his deeply-held beliefs.
Bob’s comments meant the world to me. Must have meant something to Bob, too, because every day for the rest of the week he brought me a cup of coffee before my workshop. Seems I made a new friend.
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