Manhattan Matchmaker Marni Kagan

09/07/2023

I could not disagree with this article more ... to me going dutch on a first date is just not romantic at all... if anyone thinks this perspective is too old school, I would love to hear your point of view.

AND, I seriously cannot image someone asking to get a Venmo for the woman's portion of the date if she is not interested in going out again. In the instance the article cites, they went for hot cider... can you imagine... "please Venmo me your $5.50 portion of our date." This article is crazy to me!

The times, they are a-changin'.

07/15/2023

This is long but a good read. I think a lot of women will relate and maybe find a little comfort in knowing you’re not alone (and she offers some advice on how to recover from this type of blindsiding)

https://www.theskinnypignyc.com/2021/10/the-blindsided-breakup-story/

The Blindsided Breakup Story Written by Dara Published on October 14, 2021 in Personal, Social Media Breakup books above linked at the end of this post, some of which are affiliate links, FYI. I gain a tiny commission if any purchases are made through said links, which helps prevent me from moving b...

07/10/2023

Great article in Kveller about Pixar's new movie Elemental and the themes to which Jewish-Americans can relate. But they forgot to mention in the article that the mother of the main character, Ember, is a MATCHMAKER. Definitely worth noting as matchmaking is such a big part of Jewish culture!

https://www.kveller.com/american-jews-can-see-themselves-in-disneys-elemental/?utm_source=Kveller_Maropost&utm_campaign=kveller&utm_medium=email&mpweb=1161-59397-272401

When I took my kid to see Pixar’s new “Elemental” at the movie theater last weekend, it was mostly an excuse to get us out of the house after a monotonous summer week mostly stuck at home. Frankly, I wasn’t expecting much: We’d seen some previews, but they were so vague that we didn’t ha...

06/19/2023

Question for the day: What dating/relationship advice would you give your 20 year old self?

06/09/2023

So I have finished the first season of Jewish Matchmaking on Netflix - I assume there will be a season two. I enjoyed the series despite some of the ridiculous demands of the singles (I understand that has been the main critique of the show). Naturally, they pick "characters" to keep people watching... that said, there is a bit of truth to the misguided requirements reflected in the show that many singles have.

To me, it was sad that the orthodox match end because the guy did not daven three times a day with a minyon. The girl seemed so fixated on this because it is what her father and brother do and my feeling is, they probably would want her to meet a kind, good partner at this point (who is still in their religious community) and accept his level of observance. She is 28 years old and in that community many of her appropriate matches have been long married.

I loved that it ended with the prospect of three matches that could go the distance and that the matchmaker said her job is the hardest job in the world. That a bit of hyperbole but it pretty hard! And also extremely rewarding! ❤️❤️❤️

I welcome anyone's thoughts on the series!

06/02/2023

Even smart people can fall for scams like this - be careful with people you "meet" online who raise anything to do with money with you in any form before you meet them in person (and after you meet them)

The DOJ has seized around $112 million linked to this scam.

05/25/2023

Curious to hear people's thoughts - do you think it is misleading for people to stay for multiple drinks/food on a date (from the apps where the intention was to meet for drinks) when they ultimately are not interested or do you think they are simply trying to see if a connection can grow. Do you cut off your date by an hour and a half if you are not feeling a romantic connection? Would love to hear people's perspectives on this!

05/18/2023

I finally had a chance to watch the Jewish Matchmaking show on Netflix. I liked it much more than I expected I would! It made me proud to do what I do and I also loved all the conversations discussing Jewish culture and traditions.

Initial thoughts:

- the cinematography is beautiful and I think the matchmaker they picked is excellent.

- I loved her expression of "when in doubt, go out" - I offer similar guidance to my clients that if there is enough good to warrant a first date, take an hour and a half of your life to find out if there could be potential. I also liked her statement "get over your hurdles and under the chuppah" ;)

- I don't necessary agree with "date 'em till you hate 'em" - I think giving people/relationships a chance is important but after a few dates you should know if anything is taking. No need to waste your time or the other person's.

- I agree with the woman on my page here who stated the superficiality among some of the singles is frustrating. I found Ori particularly annoying and Adi can do much better (I have only watched the first two episodes and she is still considering going out with him again). I try to give people the benefit of the doubt but there are so many flags with him (he has such an inflated sense of himself, it's painful to listen to!). I hope Adi leaves him in the dust!

- I liked watching Dani and David flirt - they were cute together. ❤️ She is a character! She noticed some manner issues that I pay attention to too - e.g. when he poured water/wine for himself but not for her. This could just be something he was not taught to do and easily fixed or it could be a sign that he is more focused on himself ... time will tell!

- While Harmonie's match seems like such a solid guy, I will be very surprised if this relationship takes and goes the distance. He is the kind of guy that she will WANT to fall in love with but I can't see her getting there. Maybe I am wrong. He seems too cerebral for her and, to me, they just seem like two very different people.

- The discussion on the apps was so spot on - that girl Cindy's analysis made me laugh 😆

I welcome anyone's thoughts! (No spoilers please! Someone I just spoke to said she binged it - I am taking my time with it. And, as always, let's keep it respectful :)

05/07/2023

I was going through a box of books and handed this book to my 8 year old and suggested he read it. He looked at me confusedly - I just saw the cover quickly and thought it was the Worst Case Scenario Survival Handbook I once had. We both had a good laugh! 😄

05/05/2023

Have any thoughts on the new Netflix Jewish Matching making show? Haven't watched - but will soon ... 😍

05/05/2023

The weather is getting nicer and it will finally start to feel like spring! If you are single and looking to meet someone, why not get off the apps (not literally but just spend less time swiping) and focus on meeting people in real life! There are so many great ways to meet people organically doing something that you love - join a sports league, sign up for a biking club, go to your school's alumni events, go to a lecture, sit outside and have drinks with friends and be social, go to a charity event and talk to other people (not just the friends you went with!), take your dog (or your friend's dog if you don't have one) to a park and socialize with other dog owners, go to a shabbat dinner or an activity organized by your church, volunteer at a soup kitchen with NY Cares or Big Brothers/Big Sisters... the list goes on! The point is, if it is important for you to meet someone don't just rely on the apps ... be proactive and get out there! ☀️☀️☀️

05/01/2023

So I was waiting for a little more followers to start posting but then figured I just will get started regardless! A new page always takes a little time to build a following!

I think the words of advice I would like to share today are what signs to look for to know that your relationship is heading in the right direction and "leveling up" (as one of my clients aptly put it). I coach my clients that your budding relationship should always be progressing. Sometimes I see expectations set too high at first - not everyone dives right in and so you can expect certain things after date 1 that you can after date 5. But soon enough if something real is taking you should see more consistent messaging between dates, different activities that require thought and not just the same date (dinner/drinks), less time between dates, day dates, meeting the other person' friends, etc. When things are staying the same - spaced out dates, minimal communication between dates, etc. you have to wonder if that person is into the relationship and sees it as something real and or how many other people he or she may be seeing as well... in NYC, until you have the conversation about exclusivity, you never know!

Feel free to add your own comment or questions!