08/05/2026
Why the advice "Staying in the Present" doesn't really work.
I have a client so distressed by her anxiety at times that she literally swims in the wooziness of it and gets immensely distressed. And in session we realised that she had been trying so hard to 'stay in the present' and not allow herself to stress terribly about the future, that the future stress was happening anyway, but staying 'present' was masking dealing with it, breaking it down and helping herself deal with it. Making her feel lousy. I wrote this post for LinkedIn on this topic a little while ago: see if it resonates with you...
"How many times have we been told to 'just stay in the present' to reduce anxiety, and how many times has it failed? Let's take catastrophising for example, sometimes leading to utter distress and complete overwhelm.
Because "present", while relevant, is a concept and a mental concept alone can actually avoid physically dealing with anxiety, much like trying to put one's hand over a pressure cooker-which just bottles up the steam. The result? Explosion!
High anxiety, fear, ungroundedness, paralysis, "not coping"- symptoms associated with not actually dealing with anxiety, while desperately trying to "stay in the present". While the brain does athletic leaps forwards, backwards and sideways, not paying attention at all.
The solution? Use a practical, simple, body based tool regularly to catch the habit and retrain the brain. Confront the anxiety in bite-sized chunks and find solutions. Gently. While grounding the body. Repeat each time the overwhelm starts. And watch how the mind in its infinite neuroplastic wisdom, allows itself to calm the heck down!
Allowing the 'sufferer' to run their anxiety and not fall victim to anxiety running them.