31/08/2026
One of the most fascinating concepts in dating psychology is projection, a term first introduced by Sigmund Freud. In relationships, it often appears as romantic idealisation which is the tendency to fill in the blanks about someone with our own hopes, desires and expectations rather than their actual behaviour.
In the early stages of attraction, the brain naturally leans toward possibility. This can make someone feel extraordinary before enough real evidence exists to support that perception. Often, what pulls us in is not just who they are, but who we imagine they could become.
This is why people can find themselves deeply attached to potential, even while overlooking inconsistency, misalignment or uncertainty. The emotional investment grows around the story as much as the person.
What makes projection so powerful is that it can delay discernment. The longer we stay attached to an imagined version of someone, the harder it becomes to engage with who they truly are.
