01/04/2024
**Conflict In the Workplace: Why traditional mediation may not be the best first step.**
There is conflict in the workplace. Two or more people are not getting along, and it has been going on for a while. The conflict is distracting others and impacting the parties’ productivity.
What should we do about this issue? Should we get HR to look at it or get a mediator?
Once upon a time, when I was working as a workplace mediator, I would be called in to sort out disputes like this, believing that if the parties participated in mediation, the problem would be solved. Quickly. Tick.
How wrong they were.
The process of workplace mediation, in general, focuses attention on the people in the middle of the conflict, as though they are the problem. This approach oversimplifies the problem.
Don’t get me wrong, mediation is a great tool, but we don't believe it should be the go-to response to a workplace conflict.
This is because it has a narrow focus that often misses so much.
In my experience, mediation generally resulted in the parties becoming increasingly aware that the leader or their leadership style was (unintentionally) responsible for the conflict arising or not being dealt with.
Issues often included a lack of clarity about roles and responsibilities, a lack of a clear vision, perceived favouritism, feeling micro-managed, etc.
The parties could often see how the problem could be resolved and what action the CEO or leader needed to take. But they were generally powerless to address the issues effectively, the leader was not always open to feedback and the parties felt that they were being blamed for something they didn’t create or couldn't fix.
Consequently, one or both parties to the mediation left the workplace because they were angry and frustrated and often felt shamed by the process. So often, the rest of the workplace knew that a mediator had been brought in to sort out that problem between those staff members.
This is why we don’t conduct traditional mediation when asked to assist with a conflict in the workplace. Our approach is understanding what triggers the conflict before taking such a significant step.
We speak with everyone on the team, including the leader, because everyone is aware that there is a conflict. Being transparent about the process assists in getting buy-in from the whole team to work towards addressing the issues. We ask everyone what’s working well and what they see as the challenges. We have a valuable conversation, and every team member feels heard.
And we ask the leader, how might you have unintentionally contributed to this issue? Owning the problem means the leader is better able to resolve the issue.
We determine what actions the leader and the team can take to help them resolve their issues. We support team members through coaching to have conversations they might have been avoiding, and sometimes, when required, we facilitate those conversations. We use positive psychology tools, such as Appreciative Inquiry, to determine what the team wants and get them to focus their attention and energy on it.
There is no quick fix for a longstanding conflict. Building trust takes time and positive action.
Workplace conflict management does not have to be difficult if we approach it with curiosity, respect and care.
