Comforted Journeys

03/28/2025

12/25/2024

It's that time of year.
Season's greetings, and a tender hug to those who are grieving.

12/16/2024

12/01/2024

Ernest Hemingway once said: In our darkest moments, we don't need solutions or advice. What we yearn for is simply human connection-a quiet presence, a gentle touch. These small gestures are the anchors that hold us steady when life feels like too much.

Please don't try to fix me. Don't take on my pain or push away my shadows. Just sit beside me as I work through my own inner storms. Be the steady hand I can reach for as I find my way.

My pain is mine to carry, my battles mine to face. But your presence reminds me I'm not alone in this vast, sometimes frightening world. It's a quiet reminder that I am worthy of love, even when I feel broken.

So, in those dark hours when I lose my way, will you just be here? Not as a rescuer, but as a companion. Hold my hand until the dawn arrives, helping me remember my strength.

Your silent support is the most precious gift you can give. It's a love that helps me remember who l am, even when I forget.

11/26/2024

One of the hardest things to do after someone dies is cleaning out their closets and drawers. Some people leave it for weeks or months because they can't bring themselves to do it, and others move everything right away because they can't bear to look at it. I get both of these responses. Neither is wrong or right and much like grief in general, we need to allow them to do this on their terms and when they are ready. Our role is to be there for them if they need us.

These are a few tips that I recently offered a widow who was struggling with this process:

1. Tackle one drawer/ section of the closet at a time. Don't rush through it. Take your time, and go through each item and really savor the memories if you can. And don't give anything away too quickly.

2. Ask friends and family if they would like anything. Some people will find comfort wearing a hat, shirt or sweater that belonged to someone they love. I still have a sweater that was my dad's and although I do not wear it often, I love that I have it.

3. Create three piles; save, gift and donate. Once you have this organized it will make things a little easier for you. And don't hesitate to ask a friend to drop the donations box off for you, it is one less thing you have to do, and it allows your friends to be helpful, which most want to be.

4. If you can't bear to let go of the collection of concert or sports t-shirts, favorite sweaters or jackets, or even the 152 business ties, find someone who can sew and ask them to make a quilt. It is a lovely thing to have, and it keeps their things close to you in a way that can be comforting and help you work through your grief.

5. For the little trinkets, like their watch or jewelry, and the special things that meant a lot to them, find a special box that you can place each item in for safe keeping.

The most important thing that I think you should remember is that this is never something you have to do right away. Take your time and do not hesitate to ask a friend or family member to help you, we get how hard this will be for you and we want to help you in any way that we can. You don't have to do these things alone, but if you need to, we respect that too.

xo
Gabby

You can find this blog here:
https://www.thehospiceheart.net/post/one-drawer-at-a-time

11/26/2024

"Grief is just love with nowhere to go." 💙💛

Lewis Carroll brings us this week's

11/26/2024

Sometimes
it takes only one song
to bring back a thousand
memories

Music has a way of moving time ,
bringing the past into present,
making us feel connected
to moments

Moments when they were here

When I hear your favorite song ,
I can almost feel your presence
beside me , as if you are just
a beat away

So I hold these songs ,
as they bring me comfort,
keeping your spirit alive
within my heart

And in those moments when
the past and present collide,
I find peace in knowing
love goes beyond
time and space

We are forever connected
by the love we hold,
and the music that
continues to play

Until we meet again …
Hello to Heaven

11/26/2024

I pull the cake out of the oven and place it on the counter. Instinctively I grab a kitchen towel and place it over the cake. It’s an action I’ve done dozens of times but today, it hits me with a flood of emotion when I realize I have no idea why I do this. I have no knowledge of the benefit or the reason.

I do it simply because my mother did it.

Each time she’d take a cake from the oven she’d cover it with a thin towel. She always did it with purpose and intent, so I do it. But I don’t know why and I can’t ask her.

I stand here staring at this towel-covered cake and feel upset with myself that I never questioned her about this delicate action. Disheartened that I never took the time to learn her little details and all of her intricacies of the kitchen and beyond.

I can no longer learn from her.
I can no longer call her to ask why she did the things she did.
I can no longer obtain her guidance and her wisdom.
I can no longer ask her questions and hear her response.

Sure, I could type it into the search bar of my computer. But, I don’t want the Google answer. I want her answer. I want her expertise. Maybe she doesn’t even know and she did it because her own mother did, and it’s cycled down through generations. Or maybe she learned it in a baking class, or from a friend.

The harshest reality is that I’ll never know.
I’ll simply never know.

And this is grief. Seven years after losing my mother I’m standing in my kitchen crying about a towel and a cake.

A towel and a cake and questions left unanswered.

If you’re blessed enough to still have your mom, ask her the questions. Even the silly ones– so that one day you don’t find yourself crying over something you wish you could know, but never can.

xox, Chels

Written by Chelsea Ohlemiller.