26/05/2026
Boyfriend “Plays Dead” For A Prank, Forgets His Partner Once Lost A Lover The Same Way
This just happened two nights ago, so I'm still reeling emotionally. I know this is long, but there's some important background context, and I am in desperate need of answers. I've been a longtime listener to the THT podcast, so I'm really hoping that the community can just...give me options on what I can do.
Almost 6 years ago, I (29M) lost my partner suddenly in an accident while he was overseas on a work trip. When I lost him, I cannot describe the pain and the anguish and the emotional hellscape that I found myself in. We planned a life together and in a fraction of a second it was all gone.
In the aftermath, I completely collapsed as a human. I left my career in healthcare, I couldn't leave my apartment for 3 months, I lost 60 pounds and was already really skinny, and I just shut down. In short, I was a mess in every single way.
With the support of some very persistent friends, community resources, and an amazing therapist, I started to process and move forward. Through intense therapy and temporary psychiatric help, I've been able to heal over the years, though grieving isn't a linear process. Fast forward to around two and a half years ago when I met my current boyfriend (29M).
It's hard to describe getting into a relationship after losing a soulmate, but please know that he wasn't a rebound and isn't second place or anything like that. I do love him with my whole heart even though I'll always still love my late partner. My boyfriend has a foundation of similar values, ideal relationship dynamics, communication styles to my late partner, but has a completely different personality, look, lifestyle, appearance, etc.
I love him for all of his differences as much as his similarities. My therapist and I knew that it was important for me to not date someone who I would expect to be a stand in for my late partner. Her and I have checked in constantly throughout the major stages of my...