26/02/2026
NOT QUITE MY IDEAL JOB…
That’s how a talent I recruited nearly a decade ago answered me recently, when I asked: "Are you happy in your new role?"
I have watched this person’s career trajectory unfold remarkably over the years. She had just changed companies, roles, locations, and status—all with an excellent compensation package. On paper, the opportunity seemed like a no-brainer.
And yet. That sentence lingered.
Because it wasn’t just about the job.
It expressed something deeper: the gap between what we experience… and what we hope for.
The "ideal" does not have to contend with reality, like Prince Charming or the perfect leader. Whereas our lives—professional and personal—are built in the tangible: choices, trade-offs, learning… and temporary balances.
What if this answer wasn’t a rational analysis… but an emotional cue?
When we say, "it’s not my ideal job," are we really talking about the position… or about ourselves?
THE SELF-CONNECTION
That day, it wasn’t just the words that arrested me. It was the energy behind them: a flickering flame. Weariness. A slight sadness. Perhaps also the silent fear of having made a mistake.
When you hear "it’s not my ideal job," it rarely concerns the job content itself; rather, it reveals an internal shift, more or less profound.
Something has moved. A gap has widened between what we imagined… and what we are experiencing.
It is then that our perspective on work changes. Sometimes a void. Sometimes an excess. Or simply a "difference" that was poorly anticipated… or even underestimated.
Sometimes we also accept an opportunity while already sensing it won’t quite fit.
Out of momentum. Or out of fear of letting an opportunity slip away.
And then there is that more intimate question:
Have I truly let go of what I left behind, whether voluntarily or not?
Because leaving a position isn’t just about changing roles. It’s also about leaving behind an environment, benchmarks, a professional identity, a certain life balance…
We evolve.
So do our expectations, our definition of purpose, success, and self-fulfillment.
Yesterday’s "ideal job" isn't always today’s.
And recognising this requires, above all, lucidity and unvarnished honesty with oneself.
Deep down, how long have we been pretending to ignore that it no longer fits?
THE ILLUSION OF CHOICE
Once the gap is acknowledged, a more uncomfortable question arises: what do we do with this realization?
To simply say, "it’s not my ideal job," is to remain in a limbo, glued in a no-decision mode. As if naming the dissatisfaction were enough, without having to face a more demanding question: what am I prepared to do to change things?
For not choosing is a choice in itself: that of inertia, of adaptation by default, of resignation. Or the temptation to wait for the context to change for us—as if a position were a fixed destination, and not a living material to be shaped.
There is also the fear of uncertainty, the relative comfort of familiar grounds, the dread of being swept away by the current and losing control over the change.
And then there is that expectation—sometimes unconscious—that the outside world—a new manager, an organisation, a context, recognition—will fill what actually stems from our own internal positioning. Isn't that the real stake?
“Most men are afraid of choice, because it requires them to choose themselves.” — Paul Valéry
The challenge, then, is to step out of the blur, to listen to what we already sense… and dare to clarify our deepest motivations.
This is how another reality may emerge: our share of responsibility. Not to blame oneself, but to become the actor once again of what we choose—or of what we accept not to change.
Being ambitious for oneself is often the first step towards a more mature team management—one that begins by recognising one’s own needs to better understand those of others.
INHABITING THE EXPERIENCE
“We walk into the future with our eyes turned towards the past.” — African Proverb
This vision of time, deeply rooted in many African cultures, reminds us that the future is built upon experience. Progress requires integrating what has been lived—keeping the lessons without carrying the weight.
When a role is not—or no longer—"ideal," the temptation can be twofold: to cling to what no longer fits, or to leave everything in a sudden move to erase the discomfort.
But between these two extremes lies a more demanding and fruitful path: that of moving forward with lucidity.
This does not necessarily mean changing your situation. Sometimes, it means changing your perspective. Reclaiming power over what depends on you: your way of contributing, of defining your boundaries, of reviewing your priorities.
It is also about acknowledging that every experience is a lesson: about your deepest motivations, your way of operating, what truly fuels your energy… and what drains it.
The "ideal job" thus ceases to be a fixed goal and becomes a living process: a continuous adjustment between who we are, what we learn, and what we choose to evolve.
A position only truly becomes "ideal" when we choose to grow within it, to have an impact, and to remain faithful to what matters.
In this dynamic, responsibility is both personal and shared :
- that of the leader, who creates a clear and demanding framework;
- that of the talent, who owns their choices;
- and that of relationships, nurtured through sincere exchanges and tough conversations.
It is not about controlling everything, but about exercising one’s capacity for action—even through small steps: contributing differently, gradually shifting one’s trajectory. It is often in these adjustments, discreet yet conscious, that serenity, engagement, and meaning are rebuilt.
Ultimately, the ideal job may not be a place. It is a way of inhabiting our own experience.
A NOT-SO-IDEAL CONCLUSION
The ideal job does not exist.
The posture, however, is a choice.
To learn, to move… and to become.
