An Examined Life Ltd

An Examined Life Ltd Some habits support us whilst others dismantle us. I am accredited to help you change the habits and behaviours that dismantle your quality of life.

The invisible problem. Most problems are invitations to look deeper. When we do, we often find that what’s needed is not...
07/01/2026

The invisible problem.

Most problems are invitations to look deeper. When we do, we often find that what’s needed is not more effort, but more awareness.

How I work has been shaped by years of sitting with humans in moments the matter. Awareness firstAction follows
31/12/2025

How I work has been shaped by years of sitting with humans in moments the matter.

Awareness first
Action follows

BEHIND™ is a way of working that begins beneath the surface.It’s not a technique.It’s an inquiry.
29/12/2025

BEHIND™ is a way of working that begins beneath the surface.

It’s not a technique.

It’s an inquiry.

Why An Examined Life? This account is a space for inquiry - for looking beneath the surface of problems, conversations a...
28/12/2025

Why An Examined Life?

This account is a space for inquiry - for looking beneath the surface of problems, conversations and behaviour.

If you’re here, you’re welcome to examine alongside me.

——- Hazel

::Commenting from a Development Coaches viewpoint on the behaviours, motives and type of intelligence that the Traitors ...
10/01/2025

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Commenting from a Development Coaches viewpoint on the behaviours, motives and type of intelligence that the Traitors and Faithfuls are using. Or not.

Standout moments

Anna outwitting the Traitors - declining their offer to join them to become a Traitor. Anna’s integrity is high, it is hard for her to be a traitor. People with high integrity are usually high on EQ and high on Ethical intelligence too. She played this move like a chess game and I actually applauded her. Traitors were stunned, they mis-read Anna completely. It was good to see them fumble a bit. it’s a game, but it is also about the human condition and I love to see the best of us.
Dan – Voted for Tyler after saying he can distinguish between emotion and logic. Ermmmm??? Nah. He jumped on the bandwagon with everyone else.
Minah – “I feel like the others have no loyalty! And she does??? Oh the irony!!!
I almost experienced severe difficulty in breathing because of a lack of air (chocked)!

Group behaviour
Group think continues to be very powerful. Tyler got the Kas treatment and got banished -he was a faithful. Once, the torch paper was lit about Tyler, he was judged because he smiles a lot apparently and that would make him perfect traitor. Well it didn’t make him a traitor at all. Everyone is trying to use Somatic intelligence (gut feel) and it is way off even though they are really sure of their guts - apparently. Many tears in the house. Is it because they are not as sure of themselves as they vote one faithful out after another?

Standout Power move
Anna – stepping into her power, by declining to join the Traitors.

Famous last words: Dan:“ I’ve bonded with Minah from the start, it’s a bit of a slice of home. I really enjoy her company”. I feel a bit of humble flavoured pie coming up to be served quite soon.
Dan to Minah: You know when you have an image of yourself and it just gets shattered? Some people are going to be really suckered in by people they really like and trust.
Jake to Linda: “Are you a Traitor Linda”? I mean!!

::This Blog will follow the episodes of the Traitor Series 3 and I will comment from a Development Coaches viewpoint on ...
10/01/2025

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This Blog will follow the episodes of the Traitor Series 3 and I will comment from a Development Coaches viewpoint on the behaviours, motives and type of intelligence that the Traitors and Faithfuls are using. Or not.
Standout moments

How Armani’s presence and opinions still hold a lot of sway. When it came to picking Kas to be banished, a number of the group used the idea that Kas has been ‘protected’ by Armani as part of their decision making. Armani is gone but her energy is still felt by the group. What does that say about the group? I have been left wondering whether they can think for themselves? It feels very much like the school playground where heresay trumps common sense or hard evidence.
Minah – crying and acting like Kas’s exit was painful. That girl deserves an Oscar. Traitor!
Linda – comforting Freddie after he’d been crying. Oh this was Oscar performance. Traitor!
Both Traitors are deliciously deceitful!

Group behaviour
Picking on Kasim. Again! Lots of school playground behaviour where the rumour has gotten around and the group just pretty much black balled Kasim on just gut feel. Well their gut feel (somatic intelligence) was so off, a nasa telescope was needed to see it.
Standout Power move (or so he thinks).
Dan –Sees his autism as a special skill. Says it makes him authentic and confident. Dan says “it makes me come across as someone who lacks empathy”. Not bloody wrong mate. It totally does! People who have empathy are usually very smart as they have life smarts and emotional intelligence. It might not be a bad idea to rely less on his autism and more tapping in on some EI. His stubbornness is getting in the way of seeing the wood for the trees.

Famous last words: Dan:“ My autism helps to decide between logic and emotion”. Both are needed Logic (Cognitive intelligence) and emotion (EQ). Cos it’s not really working for Dan or is it?

This Blog will follow the episodes of the Traitor Series 3 and I will comment from a Development Coaches viewpoint on th...
06/01/2025

This Blog will follow the episodes of the Traitor Series 3 and I will comment from a Development Coaches viewpoint on the behaviours, motives and type of intelligence that the Traitors and Faithfuls are using. Or not.

Standout moments
Minah played a blistering game against Armani. What a Chess move – High EQ at its best. She recognised what Armani was doing, understood about biding her time, upped her learning by watching what Armani was doing, Exercised restraint and waited for the right moment, Monitored the situation and got ready to strike when the iron was hot. Delicious to watch.
When Jake said to Kas, “you’re a doctor by day, killer by night” Ouch, ouch, ouch (that was very Harold Shipman thing to be accused of). Poor Relational intelligence. How to win friends and influence people – NOT!

Group behaviour
Picking on Kasim. The second highly (cognitively) intelligent person to be picked on because of how “clever” they are. Is there something wrong with applying yourself for years and becoming a success at what you do through sheer hard work. Isn’t what is being asked of the group a smidgen of the same thing? What is wrong with being bright and capable? Both Kas and Yin have book smarts in buckets; aint nothing wrong with that. Just a pattern I observed. Group think strong (unconsciously) around this topic or is it?

Standout Power move.
Minah –Banishing Armani is going to change not only the group dynamics but also the Traitor dynamics. Minah is now “head” Traitor bc for now Linda is happy to follow, but let’s see.

Famous last words: “Im having the best time being a Traitor. I don’t want to be too cocky, but Im pretty safe and popular and Im going to keep playing it the way I am”.

This Blog will follow the episodes of the Traitor Series 3 and I will comment from a Development Coaches viewpoint on th...
06/01/2025

This Blog will follow the episodes of the Traitor Series 3 and I will comment from a Development Coaches viewpoint on the behaviours, motives and type of intelligence that the Traitors and Faithfuls are using. Or not.

The first episode set the stage, but things come alive in the 2nd episode.

Standout moments
The two sisters Armani and Maia bring lots of personality to the show. Armani being the more extroverted sister, is not aware that her Sister (Maia) is very ‘energetically’ aware of how her sister behaves, so when Armani asks to be a Traitor and is accepted, her behaviour does subtly change and Maia picks up on it. In my world, what Maia practices is Somatic Intelligence although may not know it. Maia is very sensitive to Armani and now views her sister differently. Like Maia say “her energy has changed”, “something is off about Armani”. She right. She ought to trust her instincts.

Group behaviour
Lots and lots of guessing from everyone at the round table at this stage. The traitors banished Yin (with a PhD in communications from Oxford ) “because she was too clever”. Yin can pass exams and is clearly intelligent on one level, but we will never know whether she is more than just cognitively intelligent. Does she practice any other type of intelligence? We will never know. Not sure how Yins PhD would have helped with the more physically challenging tasks or the sheer gut feel of the later stages of the game but there we are, Linda, Armani and Minah were clear in their decision-making. At least they thought so!

Elen – banished bc she has a haunch that there is a “Strong female presence amongst the Traitors”. She was gentle and kind and since the group is malleable, they got moulded into seeing Elen a certain way. Elen was spot on with the gut feel. Again Somatic intelligence at play here.
Nathan and Keith were banished as collateral damage.

Ego King/Queen so far: Armani. Telling her fellow Traitors do more; translated: “I do feel like you could both be more
Like me, why are you not like me? Ouch! I predict an early exit.

Reflections from 2024. #2024
30/12/2024

Reflections from 2024.

#2024

:::As a coach, there is one consistent practice I offer to my clients; Meditation. Often, they are completely wide eyed ...
28/12/2024

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As a coach, there is one consistent practice I offer to my clients; Meditation. Often, they are completely wide eyed because they have no idea how to and interestingly they usually think it’s “woo woo”. Then I explain and teach.

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