The Contented Child, Child Wellbeing Consultancy

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The Contented Child, Child Wellbeing Consultancy The Contented Child was founded by Niki Green whilst working within the Kent Specialist Teaching and Learning Service.

The Contented Child is a Kent-based company that offers parents and professionals a wide range of training, consultancy and resources-based packages on nurturing the whole child. Sharing a talent and passion for developing nurturing and inclusive practices within the educational, work and home environments. The Contented Child offers

specialised training for parents and schools around ASC Awareness, Behaviour/Emotional Management delivered by skilled professionals

1-1 support for young people

a wide range of resources to support families and professionals

Any queries you may have about our service, please do not hesitate to contact us.

Building problem-solving skills is an important part of helping children develop emotional regulation.For many years, I ...
30/10/2026

Building problem-solving skills is an important part of helping children develop emotional regulation.

For many years, I have used this tool in my work supporting children and young people to recognise the size of a worry, put it into perspective and begin exploring possible solutions.

When a child starts to worry, their thoughts can quickly spiral. Overthinking can increase their sense of threat, activating the amygdala and triggering the brain’s protective fight, flight or freeze response.

Once this happens, accessing the thinking and problem-solving parts of the brain becomes much harder.

This is why early intervention matters.

By helping children pause, identify their worry and consider what they might do, we can support them before their emotions become overwhelming.

Rather than immediately providing the answer, I encourage adults to ask:

* What do you think you could try?
* What might make things better?
* Who could help you?

Of course, some problems need adult intervention, and children should never feel they have to manage everything independently.

The aim is not to minimise a child’s feelings, but to help them develop confidence, perspective and the skills to navigate everyday challenges.

Big feelings are always valid, even when the problem itself is small.

I NEED TO STIM, AND I WANT YOU TO UNDERSTAND WHY.For some children, stimming is an important part of how they experience...
30/10/2026

I NEED TO STIM, AND I WANT YOU TO UNDERSTAND WHY.

For some children, stimming is an important part of how they experience and regulate the world around them.

It might help them concentrate, manage overwhelming sensory input, express excitement or simply feel more comfortable in their own bodies.

Yet these movements and sounds can sometimes be misunderstood as distracting, disruptive or inappropriate.

When we ask a child to stop stimming without understanding its purpose, we may be taking away something that helps them cope.

Not every stim signals anxiety. Not every repetitive movement needs correcting.

Our role is to understand what the child is communicating through their behaviour and create environments where they feel safe to be themselves.

Sometimes, acceptance is the most effective support we can offer.

Imagine spending every school day pretending to be someone you are not.For some autistic children, masking means constan...
30/10/2026

Imagine spending every school day pretending to be someone you are not.

For some autistic children, masking means constantly monitoring how they speak, behave, move and interact with others in an effort to fit in.

It can be mentally and emotionally exhausting.

A child may appear happy, settled and coping throughout the school day, only to become overwhelmed, withdrawn or dysregulated when they return home.

This is why we must look beyond what we see in the classroom.

A child who appears to be coping is not necessarily a child who is coping.

And sometimes, the greatest distress is hidden behind the greatest effort to fit in.

LAST 24 HOURS!Over 3,700 requests have already been received for my FREE Barriers to School Attendance – A Practical Res...
29/10/2026

LAST 24 HOURS!

Over 3,700 requests have already been received for my FREE Barriers to School Attendance – A Practical Resource Pack.

This resource brings together practical tools I have developed through my years of supporting children, helping parents, carers and professionals explore the barriers affecting school attendance.

The pack includes guidance, checklists, tools to capture the child’s voice and recording forms to support collaborative working between home and school.

This is your final opportunity to request a copy.

Please follow ALL THREE steps shown on the image, including sharing this post to help more families and professionals access the resource.

IMPORTANT:

* Requests are processed manually, so please be patient.
* Please comment only once.
* The resource is available until midnight Friday 30 October (UK time).
* It will not be available after this deadline.

Your engagement helps me continue to offer resources free of charge.

Thank you for helping me get these tools into the hands of those who need them.

WHAT IS STIMMING?Hand flapping, rocking, humming, finger picking, hair twirling or repetitive movements.These behaviours...
29/10/2026

WHAT IS STIMMING?

Hand flapping, rocking, humming, finger picking, hair twirling or repetitive movements.

These behaviours can sometimes be misunderstood, particularly when they are noticeable in the classroom.

But stimming is not necessarily a sign of distress or anxiety. It can also be an expression of excitement, enjoyment or concentration.

For many neurodivergent children, stimming plays an important role in sensory and emotional regulation.

The important question is not how do we stop the behaviour, but what purpose is it serving for the child?

When we understand the function of stimming, we are better placed to support the child rather than simply suppress what we see.

And sometimes, the most helpful response is simply to allow it.

DO NOT COMMENT ON THIS POST TO REQUEST THE PACK.WHERE DID THE BARRIERS TO SCHOOL ATTENDANCE RESOURCE PACK BEGIN?With thi...
29/10/2026

DO NOT COMMENT ON THIS POST TO REQUEST THE PACK.

WHERE DID THE BARRIERS TO SCHOOL ATTENDANCE RESOURCE PACK BEGIN?

With this flowchart!

Drawing on my 30 years of supporting children, I wanted to create something practical to help parents and professionals explore the reasons why a child may be struggling to attend school.

But as I developed the flowchart, I realised it needed more.

Identifying possible barriers is only the beginning. We also need to gather evidence, understand the child’s experiences and work together to plan meaningful support.

And so, raiding my resources store from across the years, one document grew into an entire resource pack!

WHAT IS INCLUDED?

• School Avoidance Flowchart – exploring possible sensory, learning, social, emotional, family and physical health factors.

• Parent, Child and Young Person’s Voice – capturing different perspectives to help build a fuller picture of the child’s experiences.

• Sensory Processing Checklist – identifying sensory triggers and environmental difficulties.

• Executive Function Checklist – exploring difficulties with planning, organisation, working memory and other executive skills.

• Social Skills Audit – identifying possible difficulties with communication, friendships and peer relationships.

• School Perspective Record – documenting observations, attendance patterns, triggers and strategies already tried.

• Exploration and Communication Record – keeping track of information gathered and discussions held.

• Meeting Recording and Review Forms – documenting agreed actions, monitoring progress and reviewing support.

• Guidance for Parents and Professionals – explaining how to use the resources collaboratively, alongside FAQs and supporting research.

WHY DID I CREATE IT?

Because we cannot develop meaningful support without first understanding what is happening for the child.

And attendance alone should never be our only measure of success. We need to know whether the barriers are reducing and the child’s experience is improving.

WANT A COPY OF THE FULL PACK?

Please visit my original FREE Barriers to School Attendance launch post (linked in the comments) and follow the instructions in the comments to request your copy.

DO NOT REQUEST IT ON THIS POST.

Available until Friday midnight (UK time).

I have lost count of how many times I have had to explain this in the comments on my posts.Almost every time I discuss a...
29/10/2026

I have lost count of how many times I have had to explain this in the comments on my posts.

Almost every time I discuss autism, ADHD, sensory processing or other aspects of child development, someone appears to accuse me of ‘labelling children’.

There is a world of difference between labelling a child and understanding their needs.

For many children and families, a diagnosis brings answers, validation, access to support and, sometimes, an enormous sense of relief.

Understanding is not labelling. And having the language to describe a child’s experiences is not creating a problem where one does not exist.

So, after explaining this more times than I care to remember, I thought it was time to introduce a new word to the dictionary. 😂

Meet the Labellist. You may spot this visual in my comments from time to time, as I 'Preserve My Peace'.

STIMMING OR TICS – DO YOU KNOW THE DIFFERENCE?Stimming and tics can sometimes look very similar, but they are not the sa...
29/10/2026

STIMMING OR TICS – DO YOU KNOW THE DIFFERENCE?

Stimming and tics can sometimes look very similar, but they are not the same.

Understanding what is happening, and why, is important if we are to respond appropriately and support a child’s needs.

Both can occur in neurodivergent and neurotypical children, and some children experience both.

The key is to look beyond the movement or sound and understand the child’s individual experience.

Because what looks similar on the outside can feel very different on the inside.

Reassurance is a natural response when a child is anxious. We want them to feel safe, and there is nothing wrong with of...
29/10/2026

Reassurance is a natural response when a child is anxious. We want them to feel safe, and there is nothing wrong with offering comfort.

However, when a child repeatedly seeks certainty, reassurance can sometimes become part of the anxiety cycle.

The goal is not to withdraw reassurance, but to gradually help children develop the confidence to manage uncertainty, knowing that support is always available.

DO NOT COMMENT ON THIS POST TO REQUEST THE PACK.LET’S TALK CHECKLISTS!One of the most important parts of understanding s...
29/10/2026

DO NOT COMMENT ON THIS POST TO REQUEST THE PACK.

LET’S TALK CHECKLISTS!

One of the most important parts of understanding school avoidance is identifying the barriers that may be making school difficult for a child.

My free Barriers to School Attendance resource pack includes three checklists designed to help parents and professionals gather information, recognise patterns and identify possible triggers.

SENSORY PROCESSING CHECKLIST

Explores how noise, lighting, movement, touch and other sensory experiences may contribute to a child’s discomfort, anxiety or overwhelm within the school environment.

EXECUTIVE FUNCTION CHECKLIST

Looks at difficulties with planning, organisation, working memory, impulse control and cognitive flexibility. These can all affect a child’s ability to manage the demands of the school day.

SOCIAL SKILLS AUDIT

Explores social communication, peer relationships, participation and emotional understanding, helping identify where a child may be experiencing difficulties or require additional support.

WHY ARE THESE IMPORTANT?

Sometimes the barriers to attendance are not immediately obvious, particularly when a child masks their difficulties at school.

These checklists can help build a clearer picture of the child’s experiences, highlight areas requiring support and provide useful evidence when discussing possible neurodivergence assessments.

They are not diagnostic tools, but the observations gathered may contribute valuable supporting information for an assessment or referral.

Most importantly, they help move the conversation away from simply getting a child into school and towards understanding what is making school difficult.

WANT A COPY OF THE FULL PACK?

Please visit my original FREE Barriers to School Attendance launch post (link in comments) and follow the instructions there to request your copy.

DO NOT REQUEST IT IN THE COMMENTS ON THIS POST.

Available until Friday midnight (UK time).

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