31/05/2026
The truth is over a year ago I didn’t want another child
I was in hustle mode, living in my apartment with Indie away from Ryan where I’d been by myself for 6 years, I knew it would take time for us to make a plan & create our home together on our land but that didn’t make it any easier in my heart & my body
I was so done with it, I wanted to be on our land in nature so so bad 🌲
I had only realised when I started living at our land (we moved into our caravan full time for 6 months in to finish our tiny farmhouse) that I had been living in hustle mode in my apartment for sooooo many years, but when I was in it I never even knew. Of course the signs were there, drinking more alcohol by trying to escape what was in my head, female health issues that linked to stress, snapping & being frustrated a lot, over working to try & fill my time to again get me out of my head
& it was only when I came out of this unaligned life that all the realisations hit me, the dots started connecting about why I was doing the above & it was exactly that, it was an unaligned life that I was living for so many years & my mind & body was showing me through my actions, mindset & health
As soon as I moved to our land it was like this huge weight was lifted off me, it was the most freeing feeling, like I had been let out a cage & I was now free
I was now aligned & it had everything to do with my environment
My body relaxed, my mind was at peace, I could breath here, my outgoings were so much less, the hustle disappeared & this is when I realised that I would actually love to have another child, a realisation that surprised me at first but I obviously had within me the whole time it was just buried so deep within me that I couldn’t feel it
This is such a similar feeling to being onboard when it’s no longer for you. I also felt like this my last year onboard but I knew my time frame for that so it wasn’t as bad BUT if I hadn’t have given myself a time frame it would have been the EXACT SAME SITUATION
The signs are there, the signals are there it’s just so hard to connect the dots within them, it’s so hard to…
Continued in comments 👇🏽
