16/09/2026
๐ Your feelings are real. But they are not automatically someone elseโs responsibility.
A recent workshop reminded me of something important about feedback, facilitation and leadership.
Two experienced professionals got into a disagreement near the end of the workshop. What started as feedback quickly became personal. Within a short time, both were emotionally affected.
Afterward, one participant explained how hurt she had felt. That helped me understand her experience in a way I simply could not have understood while the argument was happening.
But it also made me think about something deeper.
There are at least three different things in situations like this:
๐ 1. What happened
Someone said or did something.
๐ 2. What I felt
I felt hurt, angry, embarrassed, frustrated or disrespected.
๐ 3. What I concluded
โThey don't respect me.โ
โThey are deliberately attacking me.โ
โThey are the problem.โ
The first is an observation.
The second is real and deserves acknowledgement.
The third is an interpretation โ a hypothesis about what the other person meant.
What do you think โ where should the responsibility of a leader or facilitator end, and where should personal responsibility begin?
I explore these concepts in my advance courses. I also help leaders to be self-aware in my 1:1 discovery sessions.
Full Article: https://zurl.co/SwEds