04/04/2022
How to Be Positive All the Time - Neelam Khemani Bhopal
There's no harm in feeling pessimistic sometimes, or be inclined to be at the pessimistic end of the spectrum by nature. When you're lost in the murky waters of negative thinking, it's hard to see the good in life and be an optimist.
The Positivity Blog founder, Neelam Khemani, offers eight ways to gain an optimistic outlook and a positive outlook:
I was trapped when I was younger, in my teens and early twenties. I was not physically trapped but mentally. The negative mindset poisoned a childhood, an adolescence, and the early years of adulthood that might otherwise have been good and full of opportunities. Creating walls and ceilings where there were none was the result of pessimism. Pessimism held me and my life hostage for most of the time that I suffered from it. It was a terrible waste of time. Having a pessimistic attitude does not mean you should remain that way all your life. My negative thinking was replaced with optimism when I learned to replace it with positive thinking.
The purpose of this article is to explore nine positivity habits that I developed that helped me to become an almost perpetual optimist from someone who was mostly pessimistic. I recommend that instead of adding all the habits at once, one habit is chosen and practiced for 30 days so it becomes a habit before adding another.
1. Identify the right questions to ask yourself
I have discovered that adopting an optimistic mindset is the simplest, but perhaps also most important habit. Every day, when we find ourselves in difficult, uncertain, or negative situations, the questions we ask ourselves make all the difference.
Pessimists might ask themselves:
- Why did this happen to me? Is it my fault?
- Why do bad things keep happening with me?
An optimist, however, asks questions that help open the mind to new perspectives and opportunities. Below are a few questions that help me find the optimistic perspective:
- In this situation, what is one positive aspect?
- Is there anything I can learn from it?
- How can I start resolving this problem today in a small way?
2. Build an environment that is conducive to living
You're attitude and how you think about things are affected by what you spend your time with and what information you let influence you.
- Get closer to the people who lift you up.
It is better to spend less time with people who just bring you down by being critical and negative. If you spend the most time with five people, you are an average of those five people
- Be open to information that helps you.
You should limit your exposure to negative and self-esteem-destroying media and read more positive books and blogs, watch motivational movies, listen to inspirational music, and listen to audio books and podcasts created by people who are optimistic.
3. Remember to Be Thankful For What You Have
By cultivating gratitude, you can boost your life's energy and positivity. In general, I do it by asking one or more of the following questions:
1. Is there anything in my life that I should be grateful for today?
2. How can I be grateful for the three people in my life that I can be grateful to have?
3. Is there anything about me that I should be grateful for?
Answer one or more of these questions during your day for just 60 seconds or a few minutes and reap the wonderful benefits.
4. Be sure to take care of yourself physically
It's not just about thinking differently that makes you an optimist. We also need to take care of our physical well-being. My mindset has been greatly impacted by exercise a couple of times a week, sleep of sufficient quality, and eating healthy food. I become more pessimistic and shut down when I fail to manage those very basic things and this creates negative thoughts in my head.
Do not ignore these fundamentals. You can minimize a whole bunch of problems in life by taking proper care of your physical self.
5. Start Your Day with Optimism
Setting the tone for the rest of the day begins with how you begin your morning. When you have a stress-free morning, you are likely to have less stress throughout the day.
What can you do to start your day optimistically?
Three steps that have been very effective for me are to read some positive information online or in a book very early in the morning, ask myself a gratitude question during breakfast, and then follow that up with exercise. I find this to be a good way to start my day and fill me up with energy.
6. Solutions are the key
Doing nothing about a situation will make you feel more negative about it. Consider the possibilities of the situation by using the questions I shared in step one. In order to get started, ask yourself these questions:
What can I do today to get the ball rolling?
If you are willing to take the first step, then do so. It can have a huge effect on your mood and thoughts, regardless of how small this step is. It may feel too big or it might make you procrastinate, but ask yourself this question anyway:
In what way can I move forward today in even a smaller way?
No matter how small the step is, moving forward is important.
7. Don't Worry
Any individual can suffer from the worrying habit, which is destructive and powerful. Optimism and moving forward used to be one of my biggest obstacles.
The following steps have helped me minimize worries and continue to do so to this day:
What percentage of my worries ever came true?
My guess is that most of us find the answer to be: very few. In most cases, the things you fear won't come to pass. These are only your own fears or nightmares. This question can help you to do a reality check, to come to terms with your current situation, and to understand that you are probably just creating another imaginary nightmare. Concentrate on action and solutions. If the mind is foggy and the body is inactive, the worries will grow stronger. To get from worries to resolution, use the questions in Step 1 and 6.
8. Last but not least, a reminder to keep going
The last thing I want to share with you is a simple, yet powerful, and timeless thought that comforted me when things looked bleak and encouraged me to keep going. I believe that it is always darkest before the light. When I didn't have the best social skills or a good dating life, this thought helped me hold on and keep going. When I thought my online business would never pick up, it helped me to continue on. Despite dark circumstances, it has helped me put one foot in front of another.
This has always been true for me. Why? In my blog, my business, my dating life or even in general, something always seems to happen when things seem to be at their lowest. This is probably due to the fact that I had to change my way of doing things when I was at a low point. Then again, maybe life will work itself out when I move forward. It will always happen if I take action instead of giving up. Seeing this thought come to life has reinforced my belief in staying optimistic, taking action, and keeping on going despite obstacles.
