19/01/2015
THE VITAL BUT FORGOTTEN SOFT SKILL OF TRULY SUCCESSFUL PEOPLE
Conflict is one of the great inevitabilities of life (after death and taxes). And while you can try to avoid conflict for a while, you cannot escape it.
This is especially true if you are in a leadership position in the workplace. Conflict — and, more specifically, conflict resolution — is your job. The more you are able to recognize it, understand it, and ultimately resolve it, the more successful you will be.
The vital soft skill of leaders
I don’t think it can be overstated that conflict management and resolution is perhaps the most important soft skill for leaders, because in a leadership position, you will encounter conflict every day.
Avoiding conflict is rarely a good idea, because it allows problems to fester and worsen. We’ve all had or known a boss who repeatedly gave into someone simply because he wanted to avoid the conflict. In parenting, that turns out spoiled kids; in business it turns out weak leaders.
Too many times, I’ve witnessed otherwise smart and capable professionals lose control over a project or a team because they were unwilling or unable to engage and defuse a conflict that arose.
But conflict doesn’t have to be a dead weight on a project or a team if you, as the leader, brush up on some key conflict management skills.
Hone your conflict management skills
The first step you can take is to prevent conflicts that are preventable — not all of them are, but by actually seeking out a potential conflict and taking steps to mitigate it, you’ll make your job ultimately much easier.
As a leader, you also need to be proactive in defining what is and isn’t acceptable and helpful in a given situation. If team members are often sending vague emails or not including all the relevant information, creating a template for project updates with all the necessary parts can help prevent misunderstandings and conflict. Likewise, easy to understand rules and expectations make conflicts easier to resolve: when someone doesn’t meet expectations, there are consequences.
Every conflict is an opportunity
Teachers often talk about “teachable moments,” and every conflict is a strong teachable moment. When there are two sides, two opposing viewpoints, there is a remarkable opportunity for learning, innovation, and even team building.
Great leaders don’t shy away from conflict or avoid it, but rather see it as a tool for bringing a team closer together. When there is a desire to resolve a conflict, it can be resolved — every time — and usually to the benefit of both parties.
Creating these win/win resolutions is a skill that can only be built over time with a great deal of practice, but it’s also one of the strongest hallmarks of a TRUE LEADER.
