05/09/2025
https://www.facebook.com/share/r/18a1wWy5hH/?mibextid=wwXIfr
real:
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Rescuing Others While Drowning Myself
For years, I believed love meant saving others — friends, partners, even acquaintances — from their pain, their chaos, and their consequences. I thought being needed was the same as being loved.
But here’s what I’ve come to realize, both personally and as a life coach:
Every time you rescue someone, you may unintentionally take away their power to grow.
And while doing that, you slowly abandon yourself.
I’m not saying this is easy — because it’s not.
Anyone who knows me knows I have a big heart. If someone’s struggling, my instinct is to jump in, fix it, carry it, be there. But over time, I learned the hard truth:
You can’t save someone who isn’t ready to save themselves. And in the process of trying, you can lose your own strength, joy, and peace.
Mel Robbins puts it perfectly: “You are not responsible for anyone else’s happiness. You are responsible for your own.” That hit me deep — because for so long, I was trying to be everyone’s lifeline, while neglecting the one person I needed to rescue: me.
Setting boundaries doesn’t mean you love less — it means you love wiser.
Support without saving. Love without losing yourself.
If your heart is heavy with everyone else’s struggles, ask yourself:
“What part of me have I been ignoring while trying to fix everyone else?”
Because the truth is:
Saving yourself first isn’t selfish — it’s powerful. It’s healing. And it’s the only way to truly show up for others from a place of strength.