Jurassic Junk Removal

08/28/2026

You keep the kid. 🎓
We’ll get rid of the Bowflex. 😆

08/28/2026

Church is for saving souls. 🙏

Jurassic Junk Removal is for saving marriages. 😂

08/27/2026

Marriage is about compromise.

She gets rid of the clutter.

He gets one last chance to prove he’s not part of it.

We don’t ask any questions. 😂

08/22/2026

08/19/2026

This!👇

08/14/2026

Imagine paying thousands of dollars to avoid throwing something away. 💀

That’s a storage unit.

At $135/month, you’ll pay $8,100 in five years to store stuff you apparently don’t need, but refuse to break up with.

📞 Need storage unit relationship advice? 😂

Call us at 412-538-7280 and we’ll help make… YOUR JUNK. EXTINCT! 🦖♻️🇺🇸

08/13/2026

If you keep putting “clean out the garage” on your to-do list like one day you’re going to wake up as a completely different person…

You’re not! 😂

Call us today at 412-716-9198 for a free estimate and we’ll help make… YOUR JUNK. EXTINCT! 🦖🇺🇸

08/13/2026

If you keep putting “clean out the garage” on your to-do list like one day you’re going to wake up as a completely different person…

You’re not! 😂

Call us today at 412-538-7280 for a free estimate and we’ll help make… YOUR JUNK. EXTINCT! 🦖🇺🇸

08/12/2026

HELP SETTLE A VERY SERIOUS COMPANY DEBATE. 😂🦖

Xavier has two choices:

Option 1: Attic Couture — freshly excavated from the depths of a huge cleanout. 💀

Option 2: Company Swag — clean, professional, and significantly less likely to have a backstory. 🦖

We can’t help but notice that he looks WAY happier in the Attic Couture headwear, which honestly raises more questions than it answers. 😂

So… which hat does Xavier wear better: Option 1 or Option 2?

Drop your vote below. 👇

(And yes, we’re monitoring anyone who votes for Option 1. 👀)

08/12/2026

They told us the estate was completely empty.

It was not. 💀

Meet Benny. 🐈

Even creepier? During the cleanout, we found a sign that literally said: “DON’T FORGET THE CAT.”

So either someone had incredible foresight… or Benny had been trying to contact us. 😂

Either way, Benny wasn’t getting left behind.

Estate: Empty.
Benny: Rehomed.
Haunted Cat Sign: Not our problem anymore. 💀🦖

Turns out this was a "Cat Distribution Project" disguised as an "estate cleanout"! 🐈😂