07/31/2026
Leadership Isn't About Being Liked!
One of the greatest freedoms a leader can experience is realizing that not everyone is going to like you.
That statement may sound discouraging at first, but it's actually liberating.
When we first step into leadership, many of us want everyone to appreciate our efforts. We want to be respected, accepted, and yes... even liked. There is nothing wrong with wanting positive relationships.
The problem comes when our need to be liked begins to influence our decisions.
We avoid difficult conversations because we don't want someone to be upset with us. We delay accountability because we're afraid of hurting feelings. We compromise on standards because we're hoping to keep everyone happy.
Leadership requires making decisions that aren't always popular, but are necessary!
Over the years, I've learned something very important:
“The person who needs to like you the most is you.”
I'm not talking about arrogance or believing you're always right. I'm talking about being comfortable with who you are, knowing your values, recognizing both your strengths and your shortcomings, and being able to look in the mirror at the end of the day with a clear conscience.
When you know you've acted with integrity, treated people fairly, listened with respect, and made the best decision you could with the information you had, you can sleep well—even if someone disagrees with you.
Leadership will never earn unanimous approval.
The older I get, the more I realize that peace doesn't come from everyone liking me. It comes from knowing I've tried to do the right thing.
Peg Tobin, RN
Healthcare Leadership Strategist | Executive Coach | Speaker | Author | Founder & President, Tobin & Associates