Secret Weapon Leader

06/23/2025

“The more irrational and off-base someone is, the easier it should be for you to remove yourself from their traps. Quit trying to beat them at their own game. Distance yourself from them emotionally and approach your interactions like they’re a science project . You don’t need to respond to the emotional chaos—only the facts.”

To read all of this valuable article - click the link in my bio.

06/23/2025

“The more irrational and off-base someone is, the easier it should be for you to remove yourself from their traps. Quit trying to beat them at their own game. Distance yourself from them emotionally and approach your interactions like they’re a science project. You don’t need to respond to the emotional chaos—only the facts.”

Toxic people defy logic. Some are blissfully unaware of the negative impact that they have on those around them, and others seem to derive satisfaction from creating chaos and pushing other people’s buttons.

05/27/2025

19 Questions - To help you stay positive and productive when things are turbulent and vexing

04/18/2025

💯 bottom line

01/31/2025

01/21/2025

10/10/2022

Inspirational leadership is the ability to tap into another’s inner fire and stoke it into performance greatness, all without lifting a finger to force or coerce.

This is the sought-after people magic that enables leaders to become more organically influential, rather than mechanically directive.

A recent study shows that leaders struggle to inspire - only 27% of employees say their leaders are inspiring, while 74% of leaders think they’re inspiring their teams.

The tricky thing is that inspiration is relative.

Two people can encounter the exact same thing and experience it in a totally different way. One feels inspired, the other feels nothing.

So what moves us?

Read the whole post here…

https://secretweaponleader.com/work/being-inspiring-depends-on-this/

08/23/2022

In the fast paced lifestyle of a leader there are times when we might not realize that we have become more of a disadvantage than an advantage in the eyes of our people.

Sometimes the drive to critique, perfect and inspect things can become greater than the goal to raise and develop people into free thinking, ownership-mentality leaders. At this point, It’s likely you are overcrowding the leadership space. This restricts their ability to grow and be broadly perceived as key talent assets, separate from yourself.

With these unconscious decisions you’ve moved from being a champion of your people to being their competitor.

Usually this doesn’t come from bad intentions, quite the opposite. Often this overcrowding leadership behavior stems from unbalanced ambition and an overemphasis on “managing up” in order to create the perfect image of yourself and your team to those in power. Mostly from a desire to see everyone be successful and avoid risks or damage to your collective brand.

The greater truth is, when you have talented, independent, and driven people they don’t want a boss who manages up and down so tightly that they have to fight to feel like a true owner - for their ideas and recommendations to be heard and embraced, or to compete for visibility when the majority of the face time above, and in key cross functional decisions, is occupied by their leader.

The MVPs we all covet to have on our team would rather take some risks, operate boldly, and claim their space at the organizational table so they are seen and noted for the individual work they do.

Needing to regularly intellectually fence with your leader and convince them out of their pre-determined stance so your point of view can be equally valued becomes quickly demoralizing and angering.

Particularly strong-minded people with convictions and a thirst to do hard things, and who care deeply about their career, will realize their leader is a disadvantage in the long game and plan to move on.

Double check whether you are a champion or competitor in the eyes of your team - how are you investing your time with them, and how well are you doing at letting them claim their space as ownership equals so they can challenge themselves and feel the satisfaction of knowing they are growing under your leadership.

Cultivating owners like this, not followers, helps build their careers and improve their chances for greater opportunities.

Everyone wants to bring their talent to work for a life-changing boss who cares more about advancing their future than controlling their present.

https://secretweaponleader.com/work/advantage-or-disadvantage-which-are-you/

05/25/2022

Go Find Your People

Many leaders think they know where their people are, based on where they are physically and where they are in their projects.

But if you don’t know where your people are in their mind, in that hidden place of thinking and feeling, then you don’t know where your people are at all.

It’s not a smart strategy for leaders to rely on the old ‘open door policy’ which relies on others seeking you out.

Particularly since many of us are leading leaders or high performers, who are usually very independent, dislike anything that could be perceived as whining, and take an unhealthy satisfaction from carrying a superhuman load on their shoulders alone.

They would rather soldier on until burnout than come through your open door to talk about it.

And often asking the typical ‘how’s it going’ check-in isn’t enough either. 

Busy people’s heads are full of activity making it difficult for them to know what to tell you that is meaningful.

Therefore, we have to get good at using effective doorway questions that open up “locating” conversation (especially with the tough-to-help folks) that will invite you into their heads to figure out how to give them what they need to get where they want to go, or at the very least to feel met, heard, and understood right where they are.
 
Here are a few good ones….

Click the link in profile