Today's Truth by Dr. Natasha

01/20/2024

52
5+2 = 7 = Completion
Completion, n., The action or process of finishing something.

So many things came to an end for me in year 52. I completed a long doctoral journey, keeping a promise that I made to the two women who raised me. I ended a relationship – wrong time, wrong person. I experienced loss that I am still trying to process. No matter how people you care about exit your life, they leave a hole you either fill with someone or something else, or you close it off with the proverbial brick wall. I am a master builder!

53
5+3 = 8 = New Beginnings
Allowing yourself to accept changes that might bring good things to you.

Change is scary and hard but necessary. I’m starting this 53rd orbit around the sun with a new role, a new place for The Gabster and me to lay our heads, and a new person, who may or may not be my person, but I’m here for the slow walk to find out. I’m considering Buddhism and meditation because I choose peace and joy second only to love and loyalty. Most importantly, I manifest all the good things the universe and Most High have for me.

Photo: Shutter Eye Photo
MUA: Gianni Rose
Hair: The Pharmacy for Hair Loss & Scalp Disorders, PLLC.

11/22/2019

Eight hours ago I learned that my father, whom I have had no contact with in some 25 years, passed away. I’d like to say that the news was like a gut punch, but it wasn’t. My immediate response was silence because I just didn’t know how to feel. As it started to settle in my spirit, I felt the need to share it with someone. If I said it, it was real, but once I said it was REAL.

I’ve cried off and on since I received the call, but can’t really explain why. I’m not sure if I am grieving or acknowledging that a chapter of my life is truly closed. There is no longer an opportunity for reconciliation, and I can’t say that I have ever wanted that. There is no true closure, no opportunity to articulate my feelings and views about the last 25 years, in fact, the last 40. He exited stage left early in my life only to make cameo appearances as if our relationship was a CBS drama on which he had a sporadic recurring role.

I plan to attend his services because I believe it’s what my mother would expect of me, to pay my respects. I also believe that doing so will allow the little girl who thought her father was king and sat on the couch waiting for his arrival to no avail to say goodbye. The grown up Natasha hopes that doing so will allow me to return the baggage of an absentee father to its rightful owner and bury it with him.

This is more than Today’s Truth, it’s my truth!

03/06/2019