Sunset Ridge Equine Services, LLC

09/15/2026

When “I Just Want to Ride” Becomes the Problem🔥

A trainer friend of mine recently lost it with a client. This bothered her enormously because she is normally incredibly patient. She is also kind, experienced and genuinely goes out of her way to help people.

The client was lovely too, and that matters. This isn't a story about a horrible person mistreating a horse. It's about a perfectly nice person who loved her horse, wanted to ride her horse and was struggling to see that some of the things standing between her and that goal weren't going to disappear simply because she really wanted to ride.

For a couple of months, my friend had been helping her with an anxious, spooky mare. Quite quickly, she noticed several things. The mare appeared mildly footsore. Boots were purchased, but my friend suspected more investigation was needed, including looking at diet and hoof care. The saddle had also never been properly fitted.

Then there was the riding. When the mare became anxious and rushed, the rider would shortened the reins and pulled harder on her mouth. On the ground, her handling of the lead rope was inadvertently creating confusion. Nothing malicious was happening. She simply didn't yet have the capability or insight to recognise how these interactions might feel from the horse's end of the rope.

So my friend went back to groundwork. Not because groundwork is some sacred spiritual practice, but because the woman needed to learn how to communicate with her horse. The mare was already showing some anxiety on the ground, and my friend wanted to help the owner develop the skills to guide and support her there before adding the complexity of riding. The groundwork wasn't really about groundwork. It was about helping the human become clearer, more reliable and more capable of guiding the horse when things became difficult.

Each lesson, my friend explained what they were doing and why. She demonstrated, coached and gave the woman things to practise. Unfortunately, very little was practised, so they kept returning to much the same place. This wasn't a case of a trainer endlessly insisting on groundwork while refusing to let someone progress. The things preventing that progression weren't changing. The mare was still showing some anxiety on the ground, the owner's handling wasn't improving because she wasn't practising, the feet remained questionable and the saddle remained unchecked. They couldn't progress simply because time had passed when the problems they were trying to resolve were still sitting there waiting for someone to resolve them.

Then one day the client announced that she was sick of groundwork. She wanted to ride.🤨

Somewhere inside my friend's normally well-regulated nervous system, a small fuse finally reached the explosives.💥

Because the groundwork wasn't preventing her from riding. A collection of unresolved problems affecting the horse was.

The horse's feet were uncomfortable. The saddle hadn't been assessed. The owner still struggled to guide the mare clearly, and when the mare became worried under saddle, the response was to restrict her further. Getting on and riding wasn't going to magically make any of that disappear.😑

In fact, it potentially bundled all the problems together and added a human.

This is the part of the story worth committing to your memory banks.

When we describe a horse as anxious, spooky, reluctant, resistant or lacking confidence, we are describing what the situation looks like from our side. We still need to ask what the situation might look and feel like from theirs.

Perhaps the horse isn't simply anxious about the world. Perhaps she is anxious about experiencing the world while her feet hurt. Perhaps she is reluctant because the saddle is uncomfortable. Perhaps every time she becomes worried, the human shortens the reins and increases the pressure. Perhaps she doesn't feel particularly secure with the person handling her because that person is still learning how to communicate clearly.

Then we climb aboard and wonder why the horse isn't confident.😑

Determination is a wonderful human quality, but it has limitations. You cannot out-determination sore feet. You cannot positive-think a poorly fitting saddle into fitting. You cannot repeatedly confuse a horse and overcome the consequences by deciding that today you are definitely going for a ride.😑

My friend eventually lost her temper. She wishes she hadn't, but I understand why she did. Perhaps a boundary could have been established earlier, but hindsight is wonderfully articulate. She had spent weeks trying to help someone understand what she believed the horse was experiencing, and eventually her frustration got the better of her.😕

There is a useful warning here for all of us. Horses don't experience our good intentions. They experience what actually happens to them.

You can adore your horse and still accidentally make their life difficult. That doesn't make you a bad horse owner. It gives you something to investigate, learn or change.

The problem begins when the horse keeps providing information and we decide we don't want to hear it because it interferes with what WE want to do.

So perhaps the uncomfortable question is this: do I want to solve the problem my horse is experiencing, or do I just want my horse to stop having a problem with what I want to do⁉️

Because there comes a point where saddling up and getting on is no longer perseverance. If the horse is uncomfortable, the equipment is questionable, the communication is unclear and the horse keeps struggling, but we choose to ride anyway because riding is what WE want to do, perhaps we need to stop calling that determination.

At some point, refusing to listen to the horse in front of us becomes disregard for their experience.

And surely, if WE genuinely care about horses, that should matter more than whether we get to ride today.❤

Collectable Advice 289/365

Please SHARE this one, especially with the coaches and equine professionals who have found themselves in this exact situation. I suspect many of you will read this story and think, “Yep. I’ve lived this moment too.” Sometimes the hardest part of helping the horse is helping the human see what the horse has been trying to tell them.🥹

PS. I am looking forward to Project Reboot ❤

09/15/2026

👌🏼👌🏼👌🏼

For the love of God, please... buy the horse you need NOW, not the one you will want in 5 years!

What does that mean?

I get messages from people looking for a specific type of horse, and it's normally the same horse, and it's normally the same rider. At this point I could probably just copy and paste my replies to each person.

First, they want bombproof and steady. Great! Typically this is because they are less seasoned riders, and there is nothing wrong with shopping for your first horse. After all, we all have to start somewhere!

Then the next request comes in: they want to learn to canter on the horse. Ok, well, personally, if you haven't learned how to canter I wouldn't recommend buying a horse just yet, but that is my own personal belief. So, steady, and a good teacher. Got it. *cue Rocky*

But wait, there's more! They want the horse to have upper level potential.

*cue screeching brakes*

Say what?

They repeat : Upper. Level. Potential.

I don't think people realize what that means. Can an upper level horse be a good teacher? Yes, most certainly. But typically not to a dead beginner. Can you guess why?

Let's break it down, shall we?

When you are learning to drive, you get a car that goes forward, backward, park, and typically and auto, yes? Why? Because old reliable over there isn't going to stall out or lurch forward and run you into a tree because you didn't release the clutch at the right time like a stick shift formula one race car might. (If you don't know what a stick shift car is, please use google. I'm too tired to explain this...)

So why would ANYONE think that a responsive horse with the same number of buttons is a great idea to teach a dead beginner on? Because of prestige. "My horse can do this this and that..." But do you know how to do this this and that? And what happens if you ask for a trot and you tilted your pelvis the wrong way while your legs swung during the squeeze that was too hard and now your horse is doing tempes, and you don't even know how to canter? So you panic and grab the reins, but your legs are latched onto his sides like a cat grabbing the arm of the person trying to bathe him, and now you're doing a pirouette at mach 1435845 like you're doing reigning exercises.

Out of the 13 horses on my property, only one is technically beginner safe AND upper level potential. But even he isn't dead beginner safe. His favorite game is "what if" and likes to see "what if I drop my shoulder and scoot here because they are losing their balance". But a horse that will teach you how to canter? We have Rocky, who isn't going to ever jump, ever going to win any speed classes, or get a very good score in dressage. But you know what he will do? Slow down when you panic, drop the reins and scream woah as you start to lose your balance and slide out of the saddle. He'll go in the general direction of where you ask while you learn how to steer, and then go exactly where you ask once you've figured it out. He also is really good about staying underneath his rider when they lose their balance (unlike sir Bopsie who purposely adds a little bump to that descend).

The request for the upper level potential mount is then usually followed up with young, no maintenance, pretty! ('Cuz beauty obviously is important to safety) and a very low budget, which then causes my brain to melt. At this point, I have to ask where their trainer is and who is selling them on this pipe dream, or did their trainer just roll their eyes and say "have at it" in hopes that someone else can break their client's heart.

A horse that will teach a person safely is most likely not going to be young. It'll most likely be an older, more tolerant horse that understands his job, and has seen things. Horrible things. Like when he was younger and he didn't pick his legs up over a log on the trail. And has learned things. Wonderful things. Like how to pick his legs up over a log on the trail, while also balancing a rider on his back that is sloshing around up there like a half melted slurpee in a plastic cup held by a jogger.

Equate it to this: do you want Mrs. Doubtfire taking your kids to band practice 15 miles down the main highway, or do you want Susie Q who just got her license and can't stay off her phone for more than 5 minutes? Mrs. Doubtfire will be slower, more methodical with her thinking. She may have a sore back here and there. She may not stay in your employ until your kids turn 18. She may need headache medication here and there. And she may cost you more, but you know what she can do? Handle almost any situation, and she's worth every penny. She will keep your kids from setting the house on fire, running into the street after a soccer ball, and probably get them to their practices on time and safely.
Can you honestly say that about Susie Q? Susie has no track record.

Am I saying you can never get the upper level potential horse?

No.

But what I am saying is let's all be more realistic in what we need now, and for the next year. You can always buy another horse when you are ready, because let's face it : There is a never ending demand for steady eddies and a never ending supply of less-steady eddies.

But for the love of Pete, please stop asking if he is suitable for your kid just now doing long stirrup and still falling backwards over a 2' crossrail. Ask about Rocky (except not Rocky, as Rocky refuses to jump...), who will help your kid develop her lower leg strength and timing so her transitions are smoother, her communication is better, and her strength is more easily controlled so that she can safely, and in time, work up to a horse like Pete.

Let's start thinking clearly and start setting ourselves up for success, instead of setting the hospitals up with retirement funds.

Just my two cents, take it how you will.

Picture of my steady eddie, Beats. Will he ever be upper level? No. But he taught me how to walk and ride again after I shattered my back, and he is exactly what I needed at that time.

He will also NEVER leave my farm.

08/27/2026

Love all of these 👌🏼

08/15/2026

Love this 🙌🏼

One of the most effective methods of training a horse to do all sorts of things is the PUTTER system.

To “putter” means to sort of slowly and unconcernedly mess about, with a tiny time agenda.

Horses get confused about things like what is happening in this photo, and in order for the horse to be super chill, the rider has to be super chill.

The horse moves the wrong way? No big deal.
The horse backs up when it should stand still? No big deal.
The horse wants to get quick? No big deal.

Putter, putter, putter. Sooner or later she’ll figure out what I want, and she’ll be a Steady Eddie about it if I haven’t given her any reason to be worried or upset.

Two opposite “P” words, to PRESS or to PUTTER. Putter beats press every time.

08/10/2026

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