09/12/2023
Full disclosure: The idea of having a business that centered around what God wanted me to do with my life was (and still is) terrifying!
Allow me to rewind a bit so I can explain. After our epic, mid-covid, cross-county move it took me about a year to get out of survival mode– moving is hard! It was time to start thinking about next steps as far as what I wanted to be when I grew up. I was reluctant to get a job where I had to leave the house because having a flexible schedule was important to me and my family. Scott and I had some big dreams that someday we could work and travel…so I needed to start laying some groundwork.
I decided I would try starting some type of virtual assistant business, drawing on my degree and experience throughout my early career, pre-kids. While I was researching and trying to get some consistent client work going, I ran across the Purpose Beyond Profit page. I remember watching some of the videos about having a Mission roadmap for my business. Sounded like something I needed. I met in person to learn more about this program and I remember being really emotional (I got off the call and CRIED) when discussing the concept of having a purpose for my business. I just wanted to make some money, and still keep my flexible schedule, right? How was I supposed to know what God had in mind for a purpose in my life? This was supposed to be a vocation, not a mission field.
So I set off on my own, got a few Christian authors as clients, and began to do some work. I found a few more clients and by then I was pretty much booked for retainers, and could take on some project work here and there if I wanted. I started to niche down into tech work, as I found it was something I really enjoyed. But as soon as I made that decision I noticed a few things changing. I felt frustrated and disconnected. I had at LEAST 5 training programs (both free and paid) in my training queue (serial course collectors, can I get an Amen?) I contemplated getting certified in this or that platform, because surely that would mean I had arrived right? But I never moved forward with any of it. I was on the cusp, but not taking the leap. Again, I asked myself why?
This was supposed to be just me doing my thing, to make some money and keep my own schedule, basically avoiding getting a regular J.O.B. right? The problem with that approach is the time you put in, and the money you make doesn’t seem to make up for the frustration and lack of interest that comes from being misaligned with your “assignment”. Hear me: My clients are wonderful people, with wonderful businesses and organizations that do good and mean a lot to those who they serve. But they aren’t my mission. I was operating under the false belief that just making money was enough for me…turns out it just left me frustrated and disconnected with a little extra money each month. The work served no purpose for my SOUL.
Ok so, maybe I did need to figure out what I wanted to be when I grew up. Or maybe I just needed to really give in to that nagging feeling that I should figure out what GOD wanted me to be….
At this point in my life, I had recommitted myself to doing regular bible study daily. I found a great routine in the mornings and was really getting a lot out of the deeper study. I prayed for clarity, and I decided to return to that mission roadmap concept…and it led me here. Writing this story about the frustration, overwhelm, and boredom I experienced when I tried to go it alone. And it led me to this mission: To help Christian visionaries (authors, business owners, organizations) proclaim the message God has put on their hearts, beyond themselves and into the world. What does that look like? I’m not 100 percent sure yet… but it involves me using my marketing, tech skills, and experience. OF COURSE it is all still terrifying…as I don’t really know what it looks like further down the road. But I believe for the first time since I started my business, I am on the right path. How do I know this? I’m feeling at peace with my purpose--like I can find and delight clients because they align with my mission, not just because I want to make some money. I am excited at the prospect of finding clients whose mission aligns with mine, who are also doing what they have been called to do, who have clarity in their mission and are being obedient to that call, whatever that looks like.
If you have read this far….I’m shocked! And I thank you for hanging in there while I tell my story. Have you also experienced a time when you thought you had it dialed in, but instead you were left feeling overwhelmed and scattered? Felt the need to ditch the concept of “I’ll work for anyone who will pay me” model and get more out of your vocation? Drop me a message in the comments! I would love to hear about your journey.
