10/13/2026
Today would be my father’s 101st birthday. The day before, my mother would’ve turned 101.
She was four hours older than my dad. He never let her forget it. They laughed about it.
I wish I could laugh with them right now.
My parents knew hardships, as children. Addiction and violence and hunger will mark themselves permanently upon a child. My dad wanted far more education than the Great Depression would allow. He and my mother despised prideful ignorance. They had a little respect for people who would not work, those prideful about money, especially that which they did not earn. But they were kind about it. Civil and kind.
My dad absorbed newspapers, loved the news. He was literate far beyond his formal schooling. He would have walked the coals of hell for my tuition. College was my job, my calling, to study was a holy obedience to them. All that came of that is a legacy, a tribute to them, way back to the hard ground they walked to get me here.
I miss them. They told me I made them proud. They made me far more so.
Their noble graves in Weaverville, North Carolina are no benediction. To be loved as they loved, to be revered as they were, these are forces a son must live up to all his life. They call to me still.
I wish they could’ve met my incandesc Danette Cogdill. Dr. Cogdill would have brought tears of pride and the highest love from them as she does from me.
When my precious wife says something hilarious that reminds me of my dad, I am fond to predict out loud what he would say, “Son, you better marry that girl again. You better marry her every day.”
I do! In my heart, I do.
From their place in the universe, I believe they love her so dearly, this very moment. They know I do. They are glad.
Neuroscience reminds us gratitude is literally good for the brain. More than grieve my parents on this earthly birthday, I am grateful for them, to them. Throughout their imperfections, they were exquisitely loving to the very end.
But love like that never comes to an end.
Down goes a body into a grave, or an urn, and upward the call. Live boldly, love daringly, be devout against regret of not venturing grandly. Remain humble. Stay thankful.
To write this, to hear their voices again in my memory, all of it proves death is no match for love.
Nor wisdom.
Nor gratitude.
