08/27/2026
THE DARK SIDE OF INFLUENCE
Crisis negotiators are in the business of influence.
But there is a point where influence can become something else.
Manipulation.
And sometimes the most dangerous techniques are the ones that work.
Fear can work.
Pressure can work.
Deception can work.
Exploiting vulnerability can work.
But crisis negotiation can never be measured by compliance alone.
There are Four Anchors that should hold us steady when the stakes are high:
TRUTH. TETHER. TIME. TRUST.
Truth - because credibility, once lost, may be impossible to recover.
Tether - because our job is to keep the person connected: to us, to the conversation, to the people and things that still matter, and ultimately to the possibility of another outcome.
Time - because slowing the crisis creates room for emotion to settle, thinking to return and alternatives to emerge.
Trust - because without it, influence becomes increasingly dependent upon pressure, leverage and manipulation.
So what happens when we sacrifice one of those anchors because we believe doing so might end the crisis faster?
What if the tactic works?
What kind of a negotiator are we if we depend on manipulation?
My article, “The Dark Side of Influence,” published in NTOA’s The Tactical Edge, takes a hard look at the uncomfortable territory between ethical influence and psychological manipulation in crisis negotiation.
It asks negotiators to consider not simply:
“Can I get this person to do what I want?”
But:
“What am I willing to do to get them there?”
And perhaps most importantly:
“What happens to Truth, Tether, Time and Trust when I do?”
If you negotiate crises, supervise negotiators, teach negotiation, work alongside negotiation teams - or simply believe that how we influence people matters as much as whether we succeed - I hope you’ll read it.
Then bring it back to your team.
