Creative Behavior Systems

08/26/2026

This. So powerful, and simple!

08/22/2026

Welcome back, teachers, leaders, students and families!
The first few days of school make or break your entire first month or more.. I have a gift. How we experience one another at the beginning can shape how students, staff and families feel about school long after the new supplies and first-day excitement is gone.
Most of us remember walking into a classroom and hearing the rules: what we can do, what we cannot do, and what happens if we don’t comply. Expectations matter, but so does voice, value, agency and belonging.
One of the simplest restorative tools for beginning differently is a Treatment Agreement. Rather than creating rules for students, we create community WITH them by asking: How do we want to treat one another? How do we want to feel here? What will we do when things get difficult? It’s everywhere online, so simple. Student to teacher, teacher to students and students to students. Poster paper!
This isn’t about removing expectations. It’s about creating the relationships and shared responsibility that make expectations easier to hold.
I’ve been teaching this work since 2011. Over the years it has been called trauma-aware, trauma-informed, restorative, relationship-centered and social-emotional learning. Early on, I simply called it “acceptance and awareness of self and others.”
Whatever we call it, the need underneath it hasn’t changed.
Students need voice, value and belonging. Families need it. Educators and leaders need it, too. We are all carrying stress into our communities, and we don’t need another complicated initiative to begin creating something different.
A circle. A check-in. A genuine, authentic greeting. A Treatment Agreement. A few minutes spent listening rather than directing.
Community isn’t something we create to our students, at our students, or for them. We create it WITH our students.
So before we rush to begin the work of another school year, perhaps we can remember: creating the community is the first work.
May we begin with curiosity before assumption, connection before correction and community before compliance.
I have a voice. I have value. I belong here. We all do.

08/12/2026

What If We Cared This Fiercely?
There is something about a lost animal that calls something fierce out of us!
They cannot tell us where they belong, explain what happened, what they need, what hurts or what they’re afraid of. They may be hungry, exhausted, injured, confused or hiding. Fear may make them run from safety. They are navigating circumstances they did not choose and dangers they may not understand. They are vulnerable, disoriented and without the ability to advocate for themselves. We notice, search, share, leave food/water, walk streets with flashlights, check fields, shelters, cameras. We keep looking long after it would be easier to stop.
Because vulnerability calls for care, fear deserves safety, being lost should not mean being forgotten.
Because a living being who cannot find their own way back still matters.
Perhaps that is part of why the plight of a lost animal reaches so deeply into us: we recognize what it means to be frightened, unheard, displaced, unable to make sense of what is happening, dependent upon the compassion and courage of others and desperately hoping someone will notice.
A lost dog can bring an entire community into action.
But I wonder how often we recognize that same vulnerability in one another.
How many people reading this stopped for a human being today who was frightened, lost, hungry, displaced, confused, unable to advocate for themselves or simply in need of someone to trust?
What if we brought even a fraction of that same urgency, tenderness and determination to them?
What would it feel like to be that scared, unable to find your way back to safety or need anyone to just help?
And what would it feel like to discover that the world around you had more urgency for finding a lost pet, than you? Far too many people are experiencing the very same right now, today and throughout history.
Given the direction we are going as a nation, I fear this identification will only increase over time. Find some way to advocate for those who are in need.
May we never lose our fierce compassion for animals, may we simply become as fierce in extending it to one another.

08/08/2026

When Empathy Becomes Optional-Susan Jones

I am increasingly concerned about our collective ability to hold experiences of other human beings with empathy.
Not necessarily agreement, approval or understanding.
Empathy asks something both simpler and difficult: that we recognize that another person’s experience is real to them and their humanity remains intact even when their life, beliefs, culture, choices or perspective are different from our own.
For years, schools intentionally made room for social-emotional learning SEL, restorative practices, community building, emotional literacy, perspective taking and conversations about belonging. None of these approaches are perfect or should be without thoughtful examination, but underneath them was an important recognition: educating children is about more than academic achievement, teaching young people how to exist in community is critical.
Today, before these efforts became deeply embedded in our systems, we are watching some of them become diminished, politicized or removed altogether, while witnessing extraordinary levels of division, dehumanizing language, hatred and violence around the world.
Human conflict is complicated and always begins with a disregulated nervous system and we should be paying very close attention to the relationship in between.
What happens when children have fewer opportunities to practice perspective taking or discomfort with difference is met primarily with avoidance, judgment or certainty rather than curiosity?
What happens when we become increasingly skilled at identifying who is wrong and increasingly unpracticed at recognizing the human being standing across from us?
SEL was never supposed to be about making everyone feel good. Restorative practices were never about eliminating accountability. Trauma aware work was never about excusing harmful behavior.
At their best, these practices teach something more demanding: how to remain human when things are difficult. They teach us to recognize our own reactions, tolerate discomfort, listen before assuming, understand that behavior has context, repair when harm occurs, disagree without dehumanizing, hold boundaries without abandoning compassion.
Those capacities matter everywhere and to the future of our communities.
Perhaps this is why the work I have spent so many years doing feels more relevant to me now, not less.
Beneath all of the terminology, trauma aware, restorative, mindful, social emotional is something profoundly basic:
Can we teach ourselves and our children to see another human being and remain curious about their experience?
Can we recognize another person's humanity without requiring them to first become more like us?
Can we remember that empathy isn’t weakness, agreement or surrender?
Empathy, a capacity that allows very different human beings to share space.
I worry what happens when we stop intentionally teaching and practicing it.
And believe deeply in what becomes possible when we do.

07/25/2026

What Are We Celebrating?
A recent preschool graduation message inspired me to write this, but the thoughts extend far beyond one school, one ceremony or even education itself.

It made me wonder what we are celebrating, and perhaps more importantly, what we are unintentionally communicating to one another during life's meaningful moments.

We are living in extraordinarily stressful times. Parents feel it. Educators feel it. Healthcare workers, neighbors, friends and families all carry burdens that are often invisible. When we live under chronic stress, our brains naturally become more aware of danger. We begin scanning for what could go wrong. Our intentions are usually protective, but our messages can slowly become shaped more by fear than by hope.

I have noticed this in more than one place. Conversations intended to encourage can become warnings. Celebrations can become reminders of everything that is frightening. Milestones that could leave people feeling connected sometimes leave them carrying one more burden.

Mental health matters. Belonging matters. Technology deserves thoughtful conversation. Children need play, nurturing relationships, emotional safety and caring adults who continue showing up for them.

None of those truths require us to amplify fear.

Imagine if our messages focused instead on what helps human beings thrive.

Imagine reminding parents that they do not need to be perfect. They need to be present. That children benefit from laughter, conversation, outdoor play, repair after conflict, curiosity, boundaries held with kindness, and relationships that communicate, over and over, “You matter.”

The message is no less important. It simply leaves people feeling more capable instead of more afraid.

This brings me to trust.

Trust is fragile. It is built through thousands of ordinary moments and can be weakened through repeated experiences of fear, criticism, shame or division. Every one of us interprets today's world through the lens of yesterday's experiences. Some of the threats we respond to are very real. Others are perceived through nervous systems that have learned to stay on high alert because of past experiences.

Learning to recognize the difference may be one of the most important challenges of our entire life.

When we are frightened, we often gather with people who share our fears. Sometimes that creates necessary advocacy and meaningful change. Other times it unintentionally reinforces stories that make the world feel increasingly unsafe without helping us move toward greater understanding and even being able to see what other perspectives exist.

Healthy communities are built differently.

They are built through relationships that increase trust rather than suspicion. Through conversations that invite curiosity instead of blame. Through celebrations that leave people feeling more connected rather than more overwhelmed or afraid.

Every teacher, parent, leader, coach, healthcare professional and community member has opportunities to influence the emotional climate around them.

What if we asked ourselves one simple question before speaking during life's important moments?

Will these words leave people carrying more fear, or more hope?

Perhaps that is what we should be celebrating.
Not perfection.
Not performance.
But our ability to strengthen trust, nurture connection and remind one another that we were never meant to carry this world alone.

Healthy communities are built one relationship at a time, one family at a time, one conversation at a time.

And that is always worth celebrating, especially for our children.

07/23/2026

I’m hoping to learn from current and former students.
Has BCBA training evolved to include meaningful instruction in , practices, nervous system , emotional safety, and self-awareness of the practitioner’s own attachment history, lived experiences, and triggers?
If your program included these topics in a meaningful way, I’d genuinely love to hear about it. Which program did you attend? If it did not, a simple “no” is just as valuable.
I’ve been reflecting on something I’ve written about for many years.
When I went through my BCBA program, I filled more than 30 pages with concerns about practices I believed could unintentionally create emotionally unsafe or even traumatic experiences for many students. At the time, I couldn’t fully explain why. Since then, years of learning about attachment, trauma-aware practices, nervous system regulation, and relationships have helped me better understand those concerns.
Throughout my years in education, I have met a small number of BCBAs who implement behavioral supports while preserving trust, emotional safety, dignity and strong relationships. They absolutely exist, I have learned a great deal from them. Unfortunately, my experience has been that they are the exception rather than the rule. Too often, behavioral interventions are implemented in ways that can feel authoritarian or disconnected from the relational needs of the child. I also believe this can be incredibly difficult for the practitioner, who is often following the training they received.
My intention isn’t to criticize individual practitioners. This is about the evolution of our field. BCBAs continue to hold one of the most respected roles in behavior support within education and autism services. I believe that makes it even more important to integrate trauma-aware, relationship-centered perspectives into the foundation of that work.
I’m sincerely interested in learning what’s being taught today and where meaningful changes may already be happening.
If our understanding of the brain, attachment, and trauma has evolved, perhaps our foundational training should continue evolving as well.

07/15/2026

September Breathwork Is Here!
Registration below ☮️☮️☮️

Absolute relaxation. Saturday September 19th, 9:30am-11:30am..

07/15/2026

One boring fact.
Releases pressures where anxiety is already higher than normal.

06/29/2026

July 12th, registration link here.


https://www.eventbrite.com/e/somatic-breathwork-trauma-aware-tickets-1992789960416?utm_experiment=test_share_listing&aff=ebdsshios&sg=db7240e173ff5e455140c160f9fe506214234addd5a26722fe295d9c88c01103441a175ee51bfa5479848e708214a4b1dcd89e227a80768d837d4c5637effce93027230c5cd4ea772510dd6588

06/14/2026

Many classroom practices designed to increase dialogue such as group work, , , etc., are designed to develop critical thinking, evidence-based discussion and academic discourse. However, when students have varying levels of confidence, , social status, language skills, histories or emotional regulation, these common practices can unintentionally become a space where:
Certain voices dominate.
Some students become invisible.
Disagreement feels like rejection.
Public mistakes create shame.
Social hierarchies are reinforced.
Students leave feeling less connected rather than more engaged and it spills into unstructured time, home life and sometimes shows up elsewhere amongst their community.
A trauma-aware dialogue practice should not simply focus on what students think. It should also attend to how students experience being in dialogue with one another. There are many practices to implement a sense of community within a classroom, school, etc., this is what I teach. Watch for upcoming online classes coming soon! Made simply for teachers, educators, families and students. It’s not only about the students, this work begins with us