06/14/2025
This should be hung in every dementia care home and in hospitals where there are patients with dementia.
They can’t come into your world, you have to go to theirs.
If I get dementia, I’d like my family to hang this wish list up on the wall where I live. I want them to remember these things.
1, Every time you enter the room announce yourself. “Hi (my name)-it’s (me your name).”
2, NEVER ask, Do you know who I am? That causes anxiety.
3, I want my friends and family to embrace my reality.
4, If I think my spouse is still alive or if I think we’re visiting my parents for dinner, let me believe those things. I’ll be much happier for it.
5, Don’t argue with me about what is true for me versus what is true for you.
6, And if I am not sure who you are, do not take it personally. My timeline is confusing to me.
7, And if I can no longer use utensils, do not start feeding me. Instead switch me to a finger-food diet and see if I can still feed myself.
8, If I am sad or anxious, hold my hand and listen. Do not tell me that my feelings are unfounded.
9, I don’t want to be treated like a child. Talk to me like the adult that I am.
10, I still want to enjoy the things that I’ve always enjoyed. Help me find a way to exercise, read, and visit with friends.
11, Ask me to tell you a story from my past.
12, And if I become agitated, take the time to figure out what is bothering me.
13, Treat me the way that you would want to be treated.
14, Make sure that there are plenty of snacks for me in the house. Even now if I don’t eat I get angry, and if I have dementia, I may have trouble explaining what I need.
15, Don’t talk about me as if I’m not in the room.
16, Don’t feel guilty if you cannot care for me 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. It’s not your fault and you’ve done your best. Find someone who can help you, or choose a great new place for me to live.
17, If I live in a dementia care community, please visit me often.
18, Don’t act frustrated if I mix up names, events, or places. Take a deep breath. It’s not my fault.
19, Make sure I always have my favorite music playing within earshot.
20, And if I pick up items and carry them around, help me return those items to their original place.
21, Don’t exclude me from parties and family gatherings.
22, Know that I still like receiving hugs or handshakes.
23, Remember that I am still the person you know and love.”
EVERYDAY WITH HIM IS A SPECIAL BLESSING!!
🙏ᴄᴏᴘʏ ᴀɴᴅ ᴘᴀsᴛᴇ in Honor of someone you know or knew who has dementia. In Honor of all those I know and love and lost who are fighting Dementia/Alzheimer’s.
