03/24/2025
When Caring for a Coworker Starts to Cost You at Work…
What do you do when a teammate is clearly struggling- grieving, spiraling, or just not the same person they were- and you’ve done everything you can to cover for them… but things are getting worse?
This is the tightrope so many professionals walk:
🤝 Being human vs. 🛡 Protecting your own credibility.
Compassion vs. Chaos.
Here’s what I’ve learned, and what I want others to know if you’re in a similar situation:
1. Document Everything
Start now. Not from anger, but from professionalism.
✅ Date
✅ What happened
✅ What you stepped in to fix
✅ Result
It’s not about blame, it’s about clarity and self-preservation.
2. Talk to a Manager or HR- Kindly and Honestly
You don’t have to throw anyone under the bus. Try:
“I care about 'coworker' and I know they’ve been through a lot. I’ve tried to support them, but it’s beginning to affect client work and my role. I don’t want to overstep, but I need support and clarity going forward.”
It’s compassionate, truthful, and boundary-setting all at once.
3. Set Emotional Boundaries
You can care and still step back. That’s not being cold. That’s being smart.
You’re not abandoning them. You’re refusing to go down with the ship.
They’re the captain of their own journey. You’re not their life raft.
4. If Your Company Has Mental Health Resources
Encourage leadership to make sure support is accessible:
“They’ve been through so much. Are we sure they’ve had access to the resources we offer?”
Sometimes, a nudge is all someone needs. But again- it has to come from them.
5. Take Care of You
Especially if you're a natural fixer (👋 teachers, empaths, nurturers, I see you).
You don’t need to burn yourself out to prove you're a good person.
You already are.
This isn’t an easy topic. But it’s a real one.
And if you’re navigating it, you’re not alone.
💬 Have you ever been in a situation like this? How did you handle it?