Colleen Byers Mediation, LLC

12/18/2023

Who says that ethics CLE can't be fun?!

I enjoyed sharing well-being tips and strategies with some 200 lawyers and watching Jay Reeves moderate in an awesome Santa hat!

If you missed it, we covered:

💠 digital detoxing
💠 starfish breathing
💠 rainbow breathing
💠 grounding exercises

and geeked out about understanding how and why our analytical lawyer brains work the way they do. 🧠

Need a speaker for 2024? Message me!

09/14/2023

Don’t sell yourself short.

If you can negotiate with a toddler, then you can negotiate with anyone.

You already have experience regulating your own emotions while being battered around by the other person’s volatility and irrationality.

You already have experience getting curious about what the heck is really going on here, underneath the turmoil at the surface.

You already have experience thinking outside the box to find creative solutions, especially if you ask them for their ideas.

I believe that most people are far better negotiators than they give themselves credit for,

but if you want a little extra support for your next important conversation, then reach out to me.

I offer 1:1 negotiation coaching that will help you get better results while building stronger relationships.

09/12/2023

An unanticipated benefit of mediator training was becoming a more effective advocate for my litigation clients before, during, and after mediation.

It's one thing to understand the role and benefit of a mediator on an intellectual level.

It's a whole other thing to take a deep dive into the role of a mediator on an experiential level.

Want to learn more? Message me. I love talking about mediation and effective advocacy in mediation.

Ready to join me and my co-trainers for Ellen Gelbin's online, 40-Hour, North Carolina Superior Court Mediation Training in October?

Check the comments ⬇ to register.

08/30/2023

📑 I watch my 5-year-old work hard, each night, sounding out words to improve her reading.

🏊‍♀️ I watch my 8-year-old practice her swim stroke each day in the pool.

🏅 I’m proud to model diligence & resilience for them & even more elated to share with them (& you) the joy of achieving a big professional goal.

✔ After 125 hours of coursework
+
✔ 100+ hours of coaching clients
+
✔ A challenging, 3 hour written exam ...

This summer, I officially became an Associate Certified Coach (ACC) through the International Coaching Federation (ICF).

08/18/2023

As a litigator, I used to think that mediators had an easy job.

Then I completed over 65 hours of mediation training + 2 observations.

Then I started mediating.

Then I learned how to hold all the different legal as well as non-legal interests in all the different rooms at the same time.

Then I learned how to navigate all the different legal as well as non-legal personalities in all the different rooms at the same time.

Then I learned how to advocate for a resolution while also ensuring the autonomy of the parties.

Then I learned to have the NC Dispute Resolution Commission on speed dial for all the unexpected curveballs before, during, and after mediation.

If you want to learn all this and more, then join me and Ellen Gelbin in an online, 40-Hour Superior Court Mediation Training in October.

Check the comments ⬇ to register.

04/24/2023

You are not broken. You are human.

You are not alone. There are individuals and organizations ready, willing, and able to support you.

When I spoke at the Middle District of North Carolina Bankruptcy Seminar in Pinehurst this weekend, I touched on these important points:

✨ the national research on the state of lawyer well-being;

✨ the neuroscience of how and why our brilliant legal brains are trying to keep us safe and how to work WITH neurobiology rather than just at the effect of it; and

✨ 4 practical tools to immediately implement to improve well-being:

⚒ Designated device-free times and areas;

⚒ Emergency landing exercise;

⚒ Gratitude practice; and

⚒ Mindfulness practice.

What other tips or tools do you use to improve your well-being?

01/10/2023

🕰 Time is such a limited resource that anytime someone shares theirs with me, I am touched by their generosity.

🕰 It took time for 2 busy litigators at different law firms to each nominate me (unbeknownst to me) to the National Academy of Distinguished Neutrals.

🕰 It took time for 8 different attorneys for whom I’ve mediated in the last 3 months to serve as references.

None of these 10 attorneys had to spend their precious time supporting my nomination to the National Academy of Distinguished Neutrals but each did.

Now I am privileged to join a prestigious group of some of the most well-regarded mediators in the U.S. to continue our work of building bridges and facilitating resolutions to even the most seemingly intractable conflicts.

Winston-Salem, North Carolina Mediator Colleen Byers has been admitted to the National Academy of Distinguished Neutrals. Top mediator in Winston-Salem for corporate and family dispute resolution.

10/13/2022

Gratefully celebrating 1 year in business (a few months late).

10/06/2022

Enjoyed sharing the strategies and techniques I use to facilitate difficult conversations with members of the Orange County Bar Association.

What is one strategy you find most useful when engaging in difficult conversations?

08/04/2022

I had so much fun on the Negotiate Anything podcast talking about the role of mindfulness in conflict resolution and the negotiation lessons we can learn from parenting.

Give this episode a listen and let us know what you think.

‎Show Negotiate Anything, Ep 3 Steps to Facilitate Difficult Conversations And Improve Communication With Colleen Byers, JD, MBA - Jun 3, 2022

08/04/2022

Do you ever feel like you are talking but no one is listening?

Do you ever feel like you meet unmovable resistance when you are trying to influence a particular outcome?

Do you want to instantly improve your negotiation skills?

Then lead with your why.


Let the other person know what matters to you and why it matters to you.

The other night, after I wished our daughter "good night" (for the tenth time), I closed her bedroom door and turned off the light in the hallway.

When I walked by several minutes later, I noticed the hallway light was on. Not giving it much thought, I turned it off.

A little while later, I noticed the hallway light was on - again!

I frowned but before I got carried away by my own frustration and righteousness, I saw this handwritten note from my daughter:

"I like this light on because it makes me feel close to you guys ... it makes me feel just like you guys are beside me."

When it was just about two opposing positions, ie: light on vs. light off, it was easy to become entrenched in asserting my agenda.

When my daughter led with her why, and shared with me what was important about her desire to leave the light on, she made it easy for me to acquiesce and almost impossible to remain entrenched in my position.

Which high stakes conversation could you improve by sharing with the other person why your request matters so much to you?

08/04/2022

Don't waste precious time running straight into a deadlock by trying to use logical arguments to persuade someone when they are in a place of fear.

Instead, try this 2-Step Process:

Step 1: Acknowledge that Party A believes X.
[Note you can acknowledge without agreeing.]

Step 2: Ask Party A for THEIR ideas about how to handle X.

Top mediator for Litigation attorneys in Winston-Salem, Forsyth County, Greensboro, Guilford County, Wake County, Raleigh, Durham, Charlotte, Mecklenburg County, Davie County, and Davidson County, Mediator Colleen Byers is skilled working with ligation attorneys around North Carolina.