Leeah Murray

Leeah Murray Leeah Murray

John Legend announcing a new album reminded me of that one time I met him and briefly forgot how to function. 🥴😵‍💫🤤🥰🥵☺️🙈...
09/15/2026

John Legend announcing a new album reminded me of that one time I met him and briefly forgot how to function. 🥴😵‍💫🤤🥰🥵☺️🙈

His music has been the soundtrack to so many different chapters of my life that I can hear certain songs and immediately remember exactly who I was, where I was, and what that season felt like. 🥹 Getting to meet him was such a surreal little full-circle moment, and I’m very much looking forward to adding a few more songs to the memory bank with this next album. 🥰

My soup witch skills are expanding at what may be a dangerous and irresponsible speed.Last night I informed Mark that I ...
09/14/2026

My soup witch skills are expanding at what may be a dangerous and irresponsible speed.

Last night I informed Mark that I had concocted a new recipe I was going to attempt today and that today WOULD BE A DAY OF MAGIC. I have since dubbed this creation Frankenstein Soup, which feels increasingly appropriate.

Midday, Mark moseys out of the bedroom from gaming, apparently summoned by the fumes, and goes, “something is starting to smell mighty fine.”

Me: “1–10?”
Mark: “Pretty close to a 10.”

So I motion for him to come around the couch. This poor man thinks his wife wants a hug and a kiss. No. I shove my hands in his face. “Wtf, why are you pushing me away??”

“NO. BASK IN THE GLORIOUSNESS THAT IS THE SMELL OF MY HANDS.”

Laughing, he obediently inhales my hands, and after experiencing the magnificent bouquet of fresh sage, fennel, leek and garlic goes: “Smells like onions or celery or something.”

Pft. Philistine!

Around the 3/4 mark I finally allow him a small taste.

“HOLY S**T. That’s incredible.”

And this is where things took a turn because I immediately began exclaiming, excitedly: “THIS ISN’T EVEN ITS FINAL FORM.”

Apparently this was alarming. Mark, realizing that I intended to CONTINUE EXPERIMENTING on what he now considered a perfect soup, began pleading with me to please not f**k it up.

But it was too late. I was in too deep. 1000% committed to the bit, and had to see it through.

I stood over my bubbling creation wielding Parmesan, heavy cream and a lemon while my increasingly concerned husband begged me to leave well enough alone.

100/10. Will be making this again, lol. Mark had 2 giant bowls. Now for a Toffee Apple Pie with French Vanilla ice cream & whip cream for dessert 🥰 THEN! Fortnite. Or WoW. Or both 🥰🥰🥰 I’m so ready for , lol.

My hands still smell incredible. 😂

Kierkegaard says life can only be understood backward but must be lived forward, and the universe seems to be taking tha...
09/13/2026

Kierkegaard says life can only be understood backward but must be lived forward, and the universe seems to be taking that extremely f**king seriously in my particular case.

Which would be fine, except I AM UNDERSTANDING IT FORWARDS.

I am watching the breadcrumbs drop in real time. I am documenting the synchronicities. I am deploying expert level Virgo INTJ forensic pattern analysis skills. I have considered competing hypotheses. I have accounted for my own desires, biases, and personal perspectives that could skew the data. I have reviewed the dataset extensively.

I even understand the f**king lesson. I know what I’m supposed to be learning, I know what I’m explicitly not supposed to do, and I am complying with the goddamn curriculum.

You cannot continue claiming ambiguity is character development. I have demonstrated that I have developed the character already. 🥴😭

Pattern: not repeated.
Different choice: made.
Character: developed.
Honoring significance: active.

And the demonstration of a trail implies there is a destination that I apparently am not allowed to know.

So eventually I arrive at the only conclusion that appears to coherently account for the available data and ask:

“Okay. So this is what you’re saying?”

Universe, apparently: produces The Fool card “Nuh-uh-uh ☝️ Our lips are sealed. 🤐”

Me: Excuse me?

Universe: ✨mystery, synchronicity, ineffable unknowability✨

Me: Yes, I see that. That all supports my existing analysis.

Universe: Keep going. 🥕🥕🥕

Me: WHERE?

Universe: Due to the obscene laws governing this particular dimension, we can neither confirm nor deny the destination. You are therefore required to continue without foreknowledge. Best we can offer is some more synchronicities.

At this point I would rather be peacefully steeped in a featureless void of not knowing than continuously handed what appears to be a cosmic scavenger hunt whose grand prize is additional f**king breadcrumbs.

I have fulfilled the uncertainty requirement. Advance the plot or let me be. 😭 I’m ready for the goddamn cake. I am no longer amused.

Je suis prest, ffs.

😵‍💫🥴

The Wayback Machine came for me tonight. 😂I went looking for my old MySpace because I wanted a specific photo. Couldn’t ...
09/01/2026

The Wayback Machine came for me tonight. 😂

I went looking for my old MySpace because I wanted a specific photo. Couldn’t find it, but apparently the internet kept other receipts.

In 2003, at 17, I was hand-coding FR34K.net: my blog, forums, mailing list, affiliate program, visitor counter, PayPal donations, and a whole network of sites I designed and ran.

No WordPress. No Squarespace. Just manually coding pages, Photoshopping graphics, breaking s**t, and figuring out how to fix it. 😂

Best discovery? An April 2003 post announcing I GOT MY PROM DRESS and uploaded pictures. Yes, I still have them. 😂

Then there’s 2007 me on an osCommerce developer forum, fighting PHP/HTML and my database after spending “many an hour photoshopping” a template:

“What the heck? I’m pulling my hair out.” Twenty-three years later and ain’t much changed. 😂

I’m sad most of the graphics weren’t preserved because we were doing some WILD s**t circa 2003… hand-drawn layouts, horizontal-scrolling websites, SO MANY IFRAMES. 😱🤣

And now I genuinely wonder: where did that worldwide community of girls teaching ourselves web design go? We had affiliates, “cliques,” link networks… we were building authority links before SEO existed. 😂

How many of us turned those weird little internet empires into careers? Anyway, when I say I’ve been doing this a long-ass time, apparently I have receipts. 💀

And I absolutely dare not search every other domain I owned. 😬

For my 41st birthday, the universe apparently gifted me an angry, erupting left wisdom tooth.Of course it happened durin...
08/30/2026

For my 41st birthday, the universe apparently gifted me an angry, erupting left wisdom tooth.

Of course it happened during a BLOOD MOON eclipse, at the end of what was supposed to be a hellaciously toxic and traumatic two-year stretch for Virgos.

Having personally lived through said years as a Virgo, I can confirm: accurate. Zero stars. I understand the lessons but do not yet fully appreciate the initiations. 🥵 If the universe wanted to force an emotional release…. 😂 Damn.

And apparently metaphors are no longer allowed to be subtle.

A wisdom tooth that had been partially buried for YEARS suddenly decided this was its appointed hour to force its way through. Things trapped underneath had to be excavated and released.

There was blood. There were tears. There was pain so spectacular I briefly became convinced this was how I died.

But after two years of excavating buried s**t, questioning everything I thought I knew, learning to trust myself again, and taking an unnecessarily thorough tour of the underworld, my BODY really went:

“You know what would tie this whole initiation together? Literal buried wisdom clawing its way to the surface.”

Like 👀👀 I cannot say I appreciate the orchestration just yet.

And naturally it was the left side, traditionally associated with intuition, receptivity and the unconscious. Sure. Why not. Bring me a f**king pomegranate, Persephone.

But the thing came through. The trapped s**t came out. The blood stopped. The swelling receded. And I survived The Wisdom Tooth Apocalypse of 2026.

Just in time for my uterus to make sure she had something to contribute to the blood moon festivities. Because, of course. 🙄

So I entered 41 with more of my own wisdom above the surface than I had at 40, having apparently descended into the underworld (definitely made a friend 🥰🔥🐴), paid the blood tithe, excavated what was buried and returned with the wisdom.

And I am honestly annoyed by how good the metaphor is.

The metaphors have metaphored too close to the sun. Icarus and I would like a word. Next year, please just Venmo me.

Birthday celebrations have been rescheduled for Labor Day. 😂 I deserve it. 😂

Played in the fountain + found 💶🥰
08/25/2026

Played in the fountain + found 💶🥰

Address

Portland, OR

Telephone

+15036168484

Website

,

Alerts

Be the first to know and let us send you an email when Leeah Murray posts news and promotions. Your email address will not be used for any other purpose, and you can unsubscribe at any time.

Shortcuts

Share

Category